


When the Lights Go Out

by Kantkissneverclean



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, SHE WILL BE FINE, Smut, With a side of Sanvers, fluffy stuff, i thought of this as i was trying to sleep, its sad and gay, kara gets hurt but LIVES, lots of kisses, maggie and lena are bffs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-09-25 15:21:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9826226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kantkissneverclean/pseuds/Kantkissneverclean
Summary: lena is planning to propose tonight however life never works out like you think it will.





	1. Chapter 1

Tonight is the night, Lena thought. The night she was going to propose to her girlfriend of three and a half years. Lena was going to make everything perfect. She ordered Kara favorite foods, potstickers from that place on 31st, pizza from the family owned pizzeria everyone loves and a dessert from the Italian place they went to on their first official date.

 

Tonight also happened to be movie night with Alex and Maggie. All four of them would try and meet once a month outside of work to just relax. Lena planned her proposal to coincide with movie night because she wanted it to be with family and Lena knew Kara would want to tell her sister right away when it happened so it was best to do it when they were all together.

 

Lena moved from the kitchen to the living room of her and Kara's shared apartment and sat down on the couch to watch something until every got there. Lena loved their apartment. It was originally just Lena's but Kara wanted to spend more time with her because being Supergirl tended to get in the way. So they agreed after dating for eight months to move in together.

Lena recalled their first date.

_Kara had just texted Lena that she couldn’t make it to lunch today and promised to make it up to her._ Damn _, Lena thought, she was going to ask Kara out today._

_They have known each other a little over six months and they kept playing this cat and mouse game. It wasn't until Alex told her she needs to ask Kara out on an actual data that Lena knew for sure Kara felt the same way. She was worried she would lose a wonderful friend that she wouldn’t let herself fully entertain the idea of the two of them being together. Yes she flirted relentlessly but she always kept it somewhat friendly because Kara never really seemed to want it to be anything more._

_During a game night a week ago Alex pulled Lena aside to talk to her. “Damnit Lena, are you going to ask out my sister or not? I can’t take any more of these heart eyes you keep giving each other and being oblivious about it. Ask. Her. Out. Okay?” Lena nodded and looked wistfully at Kara who was trying to see how many potstickers she could shove in her mouth. It was six._

_“But I don’t want to ruin what we have,”_

_“Well if you keep this shit up you’re both going to get hurt and she seems to be fond of you and I don’t want her to get hurt. Also you’re the only one I approve of no one else makes her as happy as you do.” Lena was touched by this to know that Alex could see past her family and just see Lena. She knew she would have to ask Kara out now. Was she scared? Hell yes. Lena finally felt like she was starting to belong and didn’t want to fuck it up but since Alex said Kara felt the same she would give it a try._

_Shortly after Kara’s text another one came from Alex. It read,_

Did you ask her yet?

 

No

 

Well hurry up you not getting any younger

_When Lena got off work she made her way to Kara’s to ask her out. She knocked on the door and considered leaving as the door opened to an enthusiastic Kara Danvers. And oh boy did Lena love the smile on her face._

_“Hey Lena! Sorry again for having to cancel lunch today, want to come in?” Kara opened up the door to let Lena in._

_“Its fine Kara I know work can get in the way.” Kara led them to the counter and sat down across from Lena._

_“Yeah,” Kara huffed out, “Snapper keeps getting on me about this article I’m writing saying I need to add more but I’m not even sure what he means by that because it’s about lamp post and there is only so much you can say about lamp posts.” Lena just smiles at Kara. She could listen to it forever. “So, what brought you by?”_

_“Oh,” what could she say? Could she just blurt it out or should she lean into it? Her mouth was faster than her brain, “I wanted to, uh, ask you out on a date because, you know, we missed lunch today and uh yeah,” Lena wasn’t a rambler unless she was a round Kara. This girl had an effect on her._

_“Oh,” Kara said a little shocked but recovered quickly, “Lena I would love to.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yes really. Is that the only reason you came over tonight?”_

_“Yeah it was actually,” Kara just smiled at Lena confession. “So how does Friday night sound? Around seven?”_

_“That sounds wonderful. You know I was wondering when you were going to ask me out?”_

_“What?” Lena looked at Kara confused._

_“Yeah, I overheard Alex and you talk at game night.”_

_“Then why didn’t you ask me out?”_

_“Because,” Kara just shrugged happily._

_“Oh, Miss Danvers you are cruel. What would you have done if I never did ask you out?”_

_“Nudge you along so more,” there was a whole side of Kara that Lena had yet to discover and she couldn’t wait to learn more._

_“Well then, Kara I will pick you up tomorrow at seven pm sharp. Wear something nice I have a feeling you're going to love this place,” Lena smirks trying to get an upper hand in this conversation._

_“As long as there is food and you pretty face I know I will,” and Lena was losing for once in her life and she didn’t mind._

 

 

It was about nine o’clock when Lena got a text from Kara saying that Maggie, Alex and her wouldn't be at movie night because some dudes decided that terrorizing National City would be a great Friday night plan. Lena just texted back “be safe love”.

 

Since her plans fell through Lena walks into the bathroom and takes a shower getting ready for bed. It always felt a little odd falling asleep without Kara next to her. Even though she missed her warmth she knows she will be there in the morning.

 

However life never works out like you think it will. Lena should know this but it’s hard to think when someone is banging very loud at, glancing at the clock on her phone, at one o'clock in the morning. _Who the hell could this be?_ Kara has a key and the window is open so she shouldn't have to knock. And come think of it where is Kara? She's usually home by now.

 

Getting up out of the bed Lena makes her way to the incessant knocking “I'm coming, calm down,” muttering to herself she looks through the peephole to see Maggie and opens the door.

 

Giving her a once over she notices dust covering her clothes and the smell of smoke and not the cigarette kind. This can't be good. “Maggie, what-”

 

“It's Kara,” Maggie rushes out.

 

Did she hear that right? “What?” Lena says again

 

Slower and calmer Maggie says “It’s Kara. Lena she’s been hurt. I, could you come with me?”

 

Okay so Kara’s not here because she hurt that Lena understood but the fact Maggie is here with two DEO agents walking up behind her is definitely not how she thought tonight was going to go. This is bad.

Lena couldn’t freak out yet not until she knows more.

 

“What do you mean Maggie? Where is she?”

 

“Lena, Kara was injured pretty badly, during the fight she at the DEO. I thought it was only right to let you what happened to her,” 

 

“And what exactly happened?” Lena was afraid to know the answer.

 

“I’ll tell you when we get there but could you please come with me?” The pleading was new. She had only ever heard Maggie use it once and that was to get Kara in the same room as Alex so they could talk about their problems because they kept avoiding each other for a full week.

 

“Okay, should I,” Lean points over her shoulder towards the bedroom unsure if she need an overnight back.

 

“No. I'll come by tomorrow and get some clothes for you.” Maggie's hands were fidgeting. “You ready to go?”

 

“Yeah.” Maggie and Lena walk silently side by side to the elevator. Lena was in her supergirl baseball t and plaid shorts walking out of her building with Maggie down to the DEO issued SUV. As they climbed in the back seat and drove off Lena was worried what Kara could have done or been done to her to warrant waking up this late. She didn't want to ask too afraid to hear the answer. Afraid Maggie might say that Kara is dying. 

 

Out of all the times Kara has been injured Lena can't really recall a time they have had to come get her at night. There was a clock on the dashboard of the car that read 1:18.

 

Maggie glanced over at Lena who was staring out the window, she was lost in thought. Maggie could tell when Lena started to over think thing and think the worst had happened. She wanted to talk to her friend to get her out of her own head but she wasn't sure if she wanted to hear what happened Kara. So she asked about her proposal instead. Maggie knew she was planning it for a while and even helped along with Clark to pick out a ring.

 

“So did you decide on getting down on one knee or putting it in a potsticker?” Lena looked at Maggie knowing she was trying to help but it wasn't working.

 

“The former,”

 

“Good call. I was afraid she was going to crack a tooth or swallow it whole. All our work wasted.”

Lena chuckled halfheartedly. She was ready to hear the answer. “What happened?”

 

Maggie locked eyes at her closest friends as sadness seeped into her eyes. “Kara got injured pretty badly fighting these two guys at the airport.” Her voice was soothing after years of practice and telling people bad news about their loved ones. “I don't know how badly but I know she blew out her powers trying to save people.” Maggie reaches out to hold Lena's hand and Lena grabs it like she's trying not to drown.

 

“Where's Alex?” Lena asks timidly.

 

“With her,”

 

“Maggie,” Lena throws her a pleading look “is it bad?” Maggie stays silent. “Is it worse than the time she defeated Metallo?” Lena barely whispered it out.

 

The last time Supergirl taught Metallo she almost died. After getting kit with kryptonite so many times she could barely stand. Alex and a few other DEO agents had to help her defeat him. As Supergirl distracted him they shot a RPG at him but not before he got one more shot in. Kara was unconscious for days. It scared Lena so much just thinking about losing her forever. But she can’t think about that now. This time it was different.

 

Maggie gently squeezes Lena's hand “I, think so.” Lena looks away from Maggie to the seat in front of her silently willing the tears not to fall. Not yet not until she sees Kara. “I'm sorry Lena I wish I knew more.” Lena just nods her head wishing the car would go faster.


	2. screaming the name of a foreigner's god

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's some fluff to balance the sad

When they get to the DEO Maggie walks hand in hand with Lena down the dim lit halls slowly making their way to the infirmary. Lena knows these halls like she knows her apartment. Pass three doors get in the elevator, up to 17th floor, get off, and go past the walkway down the hall.

Lena knows almost what every door leads to. Three doors from where they are on the left leads to the training room, the second one on the right is the “sunroom” as Kara calls it.

They walk pass the sunroom to last door on the right. As they approach Lena can hear metal clanking, and beeping coming from the room. The closer and closer they get the more Lena hates this. Staring at her shoes they stand in front of the only thing separating her from Kara, a glass door. She hears people yelling and scrambling. As Maggie squeezes her hand Lena finds the courage to look up. Her heart stops

There she is her Kara. Her friend, her lover, her star, unmoving. There are five maybe seven people in the room hovering over Kara dressed in doctor scrubs. Her super suit is lies underneath her cut open. The blue has turned to red and the gold is gone. It’s all too much for Lena. She allows the tears to fall and drops Maggie's hand to touch the glass door trying to get closer. She know she can't.  It’s useless to try to get in when she doesn't even know what’s wrong. The beeping in the room speeds up then slows down and stopped completely. A voice she recognizes yells at someone to get something when the beeping is replaced by a harsh hum. Lena falls to the floor curling into herself.

“We can’t lose her, damnit.”

“Fuck,”

“Where are those damn paddles?”

“This isn’t nap time people! Move FASTER!”

The sound of their shouting is drowned out by her own sobbing. Maggie goes after her when she falls trying to collect Lena and make her world whole when it has just been broken. Clutching on to Maggie's shoulder sobbing her heart out Lena finally understands what it must have felt like for Kara to watch her planet die.

When Kara showed up with Clark that day to interview her, Lena knew then her life would never be the same. Someone saw her as nothing but a Luthor, others saw what she wanted them to see but Kara saw the true her. The one without the facade and the last name dragging her down. To Kara she was just Lena. And Lena never wanted to be anything else.

If Kara could see her now, she would never let go, after all she was the stronger one out of the two when it came to situations like this. Lena wished and prayed to a foreign god that Kara was here now to help ease the pain but she wasn’t, she was lying with a tube down her throat bleeding out as people tried to sow her back together.

Lena continued to sob into Maggie as detective tried to calm her down rubbing soothing circles on her back. It didn't help when one the monitors flat lined for a moments. Maggie looked at the people rushing to save the hero and saw Alex who noticed the pair huddled on the floor. When her eyes met Maggie’s they told her she needs to leave. Maggie nodded and tried to get Lena up off the floor. She had no luck.

“Lena, come one we should move,” this only made Lena hold Maggie harder. “Lena look at me,” a few seconds pass before she looks up at Maggie. “Come one let’s move somewhere quieter, Okay?” Lena still didn't budge. “Hey, Alex has her now and won’t let anything happen to her.” At this Lena finally stood with Maggie as she lead them to the lounge room.

It was on the other side of the building far away from Kara, which Lena didn’t like but she knew she couldn’t help girl any more than Maggie could.  When they reach the lounge they sit on the couch along the back wall. Lena’s crying has turned into sniffles, she rest her head on Maggie’s shoulder.

“I don’t know what I would do without her Maggie.” Lena whispers. Maggie hates to see her friend so broken like this. She doesn’t know what she would do if she were in Lena’s shoes. She’d probably kick the ass of the dudes who did it but considering Lena doesn’t have martial arts training that might be a bad idea.

“I can’t lose her,”

“And you won’t Alex will make sure of that,”

“How do you know?” Lena questions.

“I don’t,” it’s a truth Maggie didn’t know she was capable of saying, “but I have hope,”

“Hope huh,”

“Yeah,”

Lena thought about the first time Kara told her about her family crest.

_ “So why and S?” Lena ask one night sitting with Kara’s head in her lap watching the credits roll on the t.v. _

_ Feeling Lena run her fingers through her hair she tells her, “It the House of El’s coat of arms. A way to identify families.” Kara pauses before whispering “El mayarah,” _

_ “El what?” _

_ “EL mayarah. It means stronger together.” Kara sits up to look at Lena. Her eyes are filled with softness. “That’s why I wear the S.” Lena nods in understanding trying the word out. It sounds strange to Kara to hear someone speak in her native tongue. A part of her thought she would be the last true Krypton. The one to carry the history, language and culture. But the way Lena repeats the word trying to get to sound just right makes her think she has found someone else to share her world with. _

_ “Am I getting it right?” Lena asks. _

_ “A little. It’s like German with the hard sounds.” _

_ “So like this? El mayarah,” _

_ “Yes, just like that,” Kara moves her hand to hold one of Lena’s her eye’s never leaving. Kara can see Lena’s tongue touch her teeth rolling her r. _

_ “What?” Lena laughs while Kara just keeps looking at her. Looking at her lips, at her eyes, her nose, the faint freckle on her chin. She really loves that freckle. “Is there something on my face?” _

_ “No,” Kara sighs with a smile on her face. _

_ “Then why are you looking at my like that?” _

_ This confused Kara. “Like what?” _

_ “I don’t know. Like I’m the sun or something,” then it clicks. _

_ “You are,” Kara states it like it’s a fact. Like Lena glows in every room she’s in. Kara leans forward to capture her lips. It’s soft and promising and filled with love. Kara pulls back to look at Lena who’s eyes are watery. “I love you,” _

_ It was the first time she’s told her. Lena takes her free hand and holds Kara’s cheek rubbing her thumb across the surface. “Kara,” she whispers. _

_ “You don’t have to say it back, I just wanted you know that I, love you.” As much as Kara wants to hear Lena say it she will wait until the words are freely given. _

_ “I love you too, Kara.” A single tear leaves her eye. Lena never thought she would hear those words said so softly without it being used against her. Saying it like is a promise that Kara will do good by her and never hurt her intentionally.   _

_ “I love you.” Kara says again bring their foreheads together. _

_ Lena will never get tired of hearing those words from her. “Will you tell me more about Krypton?” _

_ “Yes,” Lena kisses Kara with purpose.   _

  
  


They sat in silence for a while until J’onn walks in. He takes a chair from the table and sits across from the two women. “Hey, Lena, Maggie,” his tone is filled with sorrow. This affect them all, some more than others.

Lena looks up at him sniffing acknowledging his presence but saying nothing. He gets up and grabs a box of tissues that sit on the table and hands it to Lena. She blows her nose, “thanks,” her voice is rough from all the crying.

“Whatcha doing here J?” Maggie says as her hand rubs circles on Lena’s back.

“You must have questions about what happened Lena, and I’m here to tell you if you want to know,” Lena nods encouraging him to continue. “Okay.” J’onn leans forward on the chair with his elbows on his knees trying to find the best way to tell Lena what happened. She was like another daughter to him, and to see her in pain hurt him too. “We got a call that two men were trying to blow up an airport and they had alien weapons. A kind we’ve rarely seen. Sup--Kara heard they were attacking people so she flew off before we could stop her,” he laughed a little at that because it was so Kara. Always running head first into danger, it’s one of the many reasons Lena loves her.

“When doesn’t she?” Maggie added.

J’onn smiles a little at that and continues. “When she got there they had already blown up a plane and were still attacking. According to Kara she said one of them had kryptonite on them. One of them had a gun of sorts that fired kryptonian bullets, it hit her left leg first and then the back of her left knee. The other guy had these star like throwing knifes, made from kryptonite. When back up finally arrived she was barely floating above the ground still trying to distract them.

“Guardian and Alex were able to successfully take the first one down but by then part of the airport was collapsing. Using the rest of the strength she had she melted the beams together so it wouldn’t fall. Right before she solar flared the other guy was able to hit her,” J’onn’s right hand moved over his heart.

His voice got caught in his throat when he said the next part. “She was down for some time before anyone got to her, they were still trying to arrest the guys and clear the scene. When Alex got to her,” J’onn shook his head “they brought her back as fast as they could and have been trying to save her for,” he glances at his watch “almost three hours. I didn’t want to worry you until we knew if she would live but Alex and Maggie insisted just in case.”

Lena starts to cry into Maggie’s shoulder again still trying to accept the fact that she could lose Kara. Something she never thought would actually happen. Of course Lena isn’t stupid she knows that every time Kara goes out as Supergirl there's a chance. A bigger chance when kryptonite is involved but she never thought, couldn’t imagine Kara slipping through her hands.  _ If only, if only,  _ she thought.

Lena heard someone walking in and looked up to see Eliza, Kara’s mom, and Alex, her big sister, in red scrubs. Lena’s sight is blurry so she rubs her eyes and looks at the other two people she considers family. She thought they were red scrubs but taking a second look she could tell they weren’t, they were supposed to be blue. Instead they were covered in her blood.  _ Kara’s blood _ . Lena started to cry again but still kept her eyes on the two women.

Alex spoke first. “She’s alive.” Lena was relieved. There was hope.

“Barely, but she's alive. She lost a lot of blood and flat lined twice.” Eliza’s voice was soft and reassuring. Moving to sit on the other side of Lena she held her hand as she continued, “she has a tube down her throat to help her breath. Since she blew out her powers after she got hit the kryptonite blade caused damage around her heart and lungs.”

Lena looked up at Eliza who was like a mother to her silently pleading with her to tell her Kara was going to be okay.

“We don’t know if- when she will wake up. The last time she solar flared she was out for a few days. We don’t know how the kryptonite will affect her recovery. We have her under sun lamps but I'm afraid that it won’t help.” Eliza said defeated.

“There was a lot of kryptonite in her system,” Lena looked up at Alex who stood with her hands behind her back trying to gain some sort of control over her own emotions. “We took out multiple kryptonite bullets and stars out.” There was detachment to her voice like she didn’t want to admit just yet what had happened to her sister. “Without her powers she’s human and probably will heal like one, until they come back. We are keeping a close eye on her Lena, I know how much she means to you and we are doing everything we can to help her.”

“Can I see her?” Lena whispers out.

“Yes you can just, prepare yourself okay?” Eliza squeezes her hand standing with her. “It looks a lot worse than it is.” Lena just nods gripping Maggie’s and Eliza’s hands as the five of them walk the halls to Kara.

_ “Does this dress look good?” Kara asks Alex trying to decide on a dress to wear to her first date with Lena. She has tried on all of her dresses at least twice. _

_ “You look fine Kara. She’s not going to care. You could be wearing a trash bag and Lena would still only have eyes for you.” Alex says moving to pick up a dress Kara through on the floor. _

_ “But Alex!” Kara throws her hands in the air, “I want it to be the right dress!” She flops onto the couch. _

_ “Then go with this one,” Alex holds up the dress in her hands. Its blue with a skinny brown belt and comes down to Kara’s knees. “It brings out the color in your eyes, and it also happens to be you favorite so stick with it.” _

_ Kara speeds into the bathroom and changes coming back out to bear hug Alex. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You're the best sister ever!” _

_ “I’m your only sister ever,” Alex huffs out trying to wiggle out of Kara’s grasp to breath. _

_ There is a knock on the door that causes Kara to let go of Alex. Walking over to the door Kara sees it’s Lena. She opens the door. _

_ “Hi Lena!” Kara says taking in Lena. She is wearing a low cut black dress that hugs her in all the right places. Her hair is down over her left shoulder showing off her ear piercings. Kara thinks she looks stunning. It takes a moment to realize Lena is talking to her. “Huh?” _

_ Lena laughs, “I said are you ready to go?” _

_ “Oh! Yeah, let me grab my purse and we can go.” Alex eyes Lena silently threatening her. “Alex can you lock up when you leave? See you tomorrow.” Kara waves at her sister walking with Lena towards the elevator. _

_ “You look beautiful Kara.” They get in as the doors close. _

_ Blushing hard she responds in kind, “So do you Lena. Just absolutely breathtaking.” Now was Lena’s turn to blush. She couldn’t believe this was the same girl who rambles during their lunches together. “So, where are you taking me? You don't plan to kidnap me do you?” Kara jokes. _

_ “It’s a surprise. And I’m sure if I did Alex would find you in no time. She has the whole FBI at her fingertips or should I say DEO?” _

_ Kara looks at Lena wide eyed for a second before saying, “and the NCPD too,” _

_ “That’s right how could I forget Maggie.” They both chuckle as they make their way to Lena’s car. _

Walking up to the glass door of Kara’s room Lena sees her lying on the bed just like Eliza said she would be. Lena doesn’t want to believe what her eyes are seeing. She can’t do this. Not alone.  She can’t stand here while Kara is there fighting for her life. She needs Kara to help her shoulder the pain like she did when Kara opened up about krypton. But Kara isn’t next to her. Maggie, Alex, Eliza, and J’onn are and it just isn’t enough. They aren't Kara.

“You can go in if you want,” Eliza tells her gently squeezing her hand nodding towards Kara.

Lena gives one last squeeze to both women holding her hands and walks in.

There is a faint beeping she recognizes as Kara’s heartbeat, and the mechanical breathing of her lungs. She looks so small, Lena thinks. “Oh Kara,” she rounds the bed pulling the seat closer to Kara slowly reaching for her hand, afraid she will break.

Lena takes all of Kara in, the bruises on her face, the long gauzed left arm, the immaculate white sheets, and the rise and fall of her chest. “Kara,” Lena breaths out in a whisper only Kara could hear “please don’t leave me.” She rests her head on Kara’s hand letting the rest of tears fall.

The others look on from the their side of the glass leaving to give Lena some space to just be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title "foreigner's god" by hozier  
> tumblr i-am-kantkiss-neverclean


	3. chase my blues away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm trying to balance the sad stuff with cute flashbacks i don't know if it's working. the title of the chapter is a lyric from i wanna dance with somebody by Whitney Houston. i wrote a really cute scene to go with it but sadly it is not in this chapter.

When Alex comes to check on Kara a few hours later she sees Lena curled up on the bed next to Kara like a puppy. It's a bittersweet moment seeing the pair like this. She’d honestly rather walk in on them sucking face than see Kara unmoving and Lena tired from crying.

Alex checks that everything is okay with little sister. Her heart beat is getting stronger and her fluid intake is good. Since Kara is human Eliza was able to get an IV into her which helps getting antibiotics to keep any infections from growing.

By the time she is done checking on everything the sun is rising and Lena starts to wake.

“Hey,”

“How is she?” Lena sits up to get a better look at Alex who is now in her DEO outfit.

“Her heartbeat is stronger. Which is a good sign.”

Lena nods her head. “How are you?”

“I'm good,” it's a lie. Alex just doesn't want to worry Lena. She doesn't need to know she's hurting as much as her. Alex still hasn't cried yet.

“Where's Maggie?”                                                           

“She went to your apartment to grab you some clothes for a while and breakfast.”  Alex is still fiddling with the IV. “If you want you could take a shower. Get cleaned up.”

It's a not so subtle hint to say she looks like a mess. Lena hesitates to move, thinking that if she's gone too long Kara might slip away without her.

“It's okay I'll be here. I won't let her leave.” Alex sees that Lena is still not convinced and adds, “I promise.”

At this Lena slides off the bed slowly making her way to the showers near the lounge. She would be lying if she said she didn't cry in the shower.

Back in Kara's room Alex is alone with her for the first time. Taking Kara's hand in hers Alex allows a tear to fall.

“Damnit Kara. You, ugh” Alex huffs unable to find the right words. “What am I going to do with you?” She sits on the bed next to Kara wishing her sister was up so they could talk and bicker for the nth time whether or not it was the right call to leave without back up _again_.

“I swear to Rao if you die I'll bring you back just kill you myself. I can't lose you. You're too important to me, to Lena, to J’onn, to your family. Please comeback.” Alex cries silently.

Maggie knocks softly on the door into Kara’s room. “Hey Al,”

Alex hurriedly wiped away her tears and looks at Maggie “hey,”

“You know it's alright to cry. You don't have to be a rock for everyone okay? You tend to push your feelings down when you need to let them out.” Maggie makes her way to Alex and wraps her free hand around her shoulder kissing the top of her head.

“I know,” Alex says defeated.

“I’m here for you okay?”

“Thanks Maggs,”

There's a moment of silence between them before Maggie speaks again. “Where's little Luthor? I got her stuff.” She lifts the bag in her hand for emphasis.

“Shower,”

“That's good she could use one after the night she had,”

“Agreed”

Maggie puts the bag down and pulls a chair up to sit next to Alex and Kara, and starts laughing to herself.

“What are you laughing about,” Alex asks.

“I just--, you remember that time Kara over here was convinced that rat was eating her food?”

Laughing a little Alex response, “oh my god yes! She want to catch him but didn't want to kill it.”

“And every time she tried to lay a trap the rat would never fall for it!” Maggie started to laugh so hard a tear fell out.

“She waited, what was it six whole hours, with a shoebox ready to catch it. She even called me to see if I would come over to help so she would miss her date with Lena.”

“I remember that! Lena texted me wondering if Kara had been exposed to something that made her girlfriend go mad.”

“In my defense it was a little strange how she thought one small animal could take all the cheese out of her refrigerator.” Maggie and Alex both look up to see Lena standing in the doorway dressed in black and holding a towel to her damp hair. She walked across the room and pulled up a chair to face the two.

“Yeah, but do you remember how she reacted when you said you got it?” Alex asked.

“She was flabbergasted! Didn’t understand how Supergirl couldn't get the little pest. I guess some people are better at things than she is.” Kara was anything but mad she was quite happy to have the pest gone. It did hurt a little to know she didn’t get it because she waited six hours _six_ to catch it. But Kara knew that Lena probably paid for someone to get it out.

The three women chuckle at that. Maggie picks up the bag she had and put it down beside Lena.

“Thanks,”

“It's no problem, I just she wakes up soon. You didn't seem to have many t-shirts.”

“That's because I always steal Kara’s,” Lena said with a tinge of sadness.

Maggie pulls out a paper bag from the one she put next to Lena. “I got breakfast. It's from Noonan’s. Four muffins, three sticky bun and hot coffee. Wait a minute crap I forgot the coffee my bad.”

“It's okay we can just grab some from the break room down the hall.” Alex says reaching for the bag and pulling out a blueberry muffin. Maggie pulls out a sticky bun and hands it to Lena.

“Thanks,” Maggie nods and takes one as well and returns back to her seat.

Looking at the sticky bun in her hand Lena says “did you know she could eat like ten of these in one sitting?”

“She tried for eleven once and It didn't end well,” Alex adds and moves from the bed and drags another chair to sit by Maggie.

“They're her third favorite food right behind potstickers.” Her favorite food was Lena, she said so herself, but that’s not the kind of thing her sister should know. The conversation dies down and the three are left just thinking about Kara, about work, anything really.

Lena picks at the muffin in her hand.

_Lena walks into the living room wearing her new lacy boy shorts that have the Supergirl logo on the front and a black green day tank top. As she walk towards the couch Kara stares at her like a deer caught in the headlights._

_“See something you like Kar?” Lena husks out swaying her hips as she moves towards Kara. She takes the bowl of popcorn she had in her hands and moves it to the floor so she can straddle her girlfriend._

_“Uhmm,” Kara gulps, “Yeah, but you know what this means right?” pointing the House of El emblem._

_“What does what mean?” Lena wraps her hands around her neck._

_“You wearing my family crest.” Lena shakes her head no, “Well, uhm,” Kara clears her throat and tries again. It’s hard when you girlfriend looks at you with nothing but lust and love. “On Krypton wearing another's crest, means, uh, well your family.”_

_Lena sits up taller to look at Kara and asks softly, “what do you mean by that? Like are we married?”_

_“Yeah kinda?” Kara raises her hand to fidget with glasses that are not there. “But it's more like you promise to be with that person no matter what,”_

_“Oh,” Lena is not quite sure how to feel about this admission.  “So on Krypton wearing a family crest that you were not born into would be an indicator of marriage?”_

_“But it doesn’t mean that we are married because we haven’t talked about it, so it’s more like a promise of marriage? I guess the closes thing on earth would be like a promise ring or an engagement ring. I know earth customs are different, they usually involve rings.”_

_Kara looks like she’s about to hyperventilate so Lena takes Kara’s hands and holds them in her lap waiting for Kara to look at her. When she does Lena is there to reassures her. “I would love to marry you someday Kara,” she smiles. “This isn’t something we have talked about at all so I understand you’re worry._

_I know Krypton's culture is very different from earths so if wearing the House of El’s crest means what I think it does, then I want to give you the Luthor crest. I don’t mean now or tomorrow but I would love to marry you sometime in the future, Kara Zor-El. Maybe we can find a way to merge our two cultures into one? How does that sound?”_

_“Perfect.”_

_“So can we agree right now that me wearing this means I won’t leave you?”_

_“Yes,” Kara could handle that.  A promise to promise to marry was something she didn’t think could happen. Just to hear Lena say that made the fire inside her ignite._

_Separating her hand from Lena’s she brings them up to cup her face drawing it closer to her own. “I’m going to kiss you now,” Lena captures Kara’s lips pulling her closer. Her tongue runs across the reporters as she opens her mouth letting her in. Kara doesn’t know who moans in to the kiss first all she feels is Lena biting down on her bottom lip.  Lena makes her way down Kara’s neck and licks under her ear moaning. This causes Kara to stand moving them to the bedroom. They spend the rest of the night promising each other over and over again that they will never leave._

Lena is still picking at the muffin in her hand as thinking about that night. It was a few months ago and the very next day she asked Maggie and Winn to help her come up with a design for a ring. She even asked Clark about the marriage customs on Krypton so she could make sure when she proposed she was doing it right. It was only a week or so ago that they finally finished the ring and Lena thought last night was going to be the night she would promise Kara forever.

Lean starts to talk but stops herself. Maggie and Alex patiently wait for her to talk. Starting again she whispers out “I was planning to- to propose last night,” Alex reaches her hand over to Lena squeezing it.

Her eyes downcast she says, “I had this whole thing planned. I ordered those post stickers from that place on 31st and her favorite pizza along with Italian from the place we had our first real date.” She becomes teary eyed looking longingly at Kara. “I was going to play The Proposal because I know it makes her laugh and she loves Ryan Reynolds. When it was over that's when I was going to ask her. I had this whole speech prepared. I worked on it for weeks,” Maggie knew about it because Lena asked her if it was good enough for Kara. Of course Maggie said that is was Lena would always be good enough for her.

Looking up from Kara to Alex Lena continues “I invited you both because I knew as soon as I asked she would have wanted to tell you and you wouldn't want to wait to tell Maggie.”

Alex is amazed how thorough she was with this but she shouldn’t be surprised because Lena always thinks of everything it’s her job.  “You really thought this through didn't you Lena?”

“I wanted it to be perfect, and you’re family. It means a lot, to the both of us.” Lena half smiles and closes her eyes letting the tears fall. Lena can’t remember ever crying over anyone like she is doing with Kara. She cried when she found out her brother turned evil, when she called the cops on her mother, and when Lionel died, but it was nothing like this. She was surprised the ocean of tears had not run dry.

Alex waits for her to finish squeezing her hand and tells her “Kara would have loved it, Lena you know she would've. She told me earlier that day you were thinking about buying a house and she was already planning what to put in it. She wanted a yard in case you ever agreed on the dog.” Alex's free hand moves to hold Kara's. “She couldn't wait to spend the rest of her life with you Lena. She loves you.”

“I know.” Lena squeeze her hand back, “I love her more than I ever thought possible”

“She’ll wake up and when she does and hears your perfectly crafted speech she will say yes.” Maggie interjected.

“If she wakes up,” Lena corrected.

“Lena,” Alex scolds her like she does Kara when she starters eating before everyone sits down at the table for dinner. “She will wake up it's just a matter of when she will.” Kara doesn't have her powers so she has to heal like a human, goes left unsaid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know when i will have the next chapter out but it will start to show kara's recovery and bc i'm too lazy to learn all the medical stuff it might be wildly inaccurate it's called suspension of disbelief for a reason  
> hope you liked it  
> tumblr i-am-kantkiss-neverclean


	4. my whole life long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is longer than the others and thanks for all your comments they make me want to keep writing this. don't worry kara should be up in the next chapter (maybe)

 

By day four there is still no sign of improvement. Lena had Jess cancel all of her meetings for the next few weeks, so she could help the DEO and Kara. She has been going through her brothers old files and Kara’s mother’s hologram to try and find something that would help. There wasn’t much until she came across this one thing her brother wrote. It said that Kryptonite, if left long enough in the bloodstream, can leave behind microscopic particles that make Kryptonians unable to heal properly. This gave Lena and idea.

 

Walking out of Kara’s room, laptop in hand, she made her way to the medical bay in search of Alex who was looking through a microscope. “Alex, look at this,” Lena showed her the page her brother had wrote.

 

“Okay now we have something.” Alex got up from her spot and walked to a table in the middle of the room. “So it sound like the only thing that will get all of the Kryptonite out of her is a blood transfusion, but I don’t think we have anything that can pierce Clark’s skin.”

 

“I might be able to help with that actually,” Lena says blushing.

 

“Lena,” and there’s that famous Alex Danvers worried tone.

 

“I may or may not have been trying to develop medical tools for kryptonians so they don’t have to blow out their powers to get treatment.” Alex shoots her a look telling her to explain just exactly what these tools could be. “So theoretically if you could hollow out kryptonite and incase it in lead it should be able to pierce their skin, allowing them to get their blood drawn.”

 

“Lena, I can’t believe I am saying this, do you have a needle like that?”

 

“If I said yes you can’t ask where I got the Kryptonite. Deal?” Lena knows she’s in a world of trouble with Alex for this but when J’onn found out Lena was working to develop technology to help aliens he might have asked her to see what she could make to help sample DNA from alien’s with impenetrable skin. When Lena said she needed Kryptonite to make it he allowed her to use it and promise that she had to make it at the DEO and it could never leave the room it was in unless needed. Like now.

 

“Fine deal. Now where is it?”

 

“Basement level 8 room K-36.” Alex rushes out of the room as Lena yell, “But you're going to need J’onn to get to it!”

 

Not even ten minutes later Alex returns with J’onn in tow and a whole array of medical equipment that could pierce Clark’s skin.

 

“Now Alex, this equipment cannot leave yours and Lena's sight. I mean it! I don't trust anyone else with it especially after the incident. We can't have anyone getting into the wrong hands okay?”

 

“Yes sir!” Alex respond as J’onn leaves the room to make sure National City is burning to the ground without their hero.

“We should call Clark now. If you can do that I'll go ahead and set up everything we need okay?” Alex doesn't wait for Lena to respond as she moves around to collect what she needs for a blood transfusion.

 

“Okay,” Lena whispers more to herself. She hadn't really told Clark all of what happened. He knows Kara was hurt but not how bad it was. Lena didn't want to distract Clark from doing his job any more than necessary.  

 

Walking back to Kara’s room Lena ruffles through her stuff to find her phone. Picking it up out of the bag Maggie brought she calls Clark.

 

“Hello! Clark Kent speaking how can I help you?” His voice had a similar tone Kara’s bright  one.  

 

“Hey, Clark it's Lena.” She sits down on the chair she claimed for this room days ago.

 

“Hey Lena what's up? Is Kara okay?” He sounded a little worried.

 

“Actually I was wondering if you could stop by the DEO sometime today. We’re working on a theory and Alex and I would like to test it out, with your help.”

 

“Of course! Give me a few minutes and over there shortly.”

 

“Thank you Clark,”

 

“Anything for Kara.”

 

Hanging up her phone Lena walks back to the medical bay to tell Alex Clark will be here soon. Grabbing her computer she finds a stool near a microscope and sits down to watch Alex who is still hustling to everything she needs. There are sun lamps around part of the bench for what Lena assumes is to help Clark regenerate his blood faster.

 

Leaning on her left arm Lena looks at Alex. “The needle hasn't been formally tested yet. And the scalpel is pretty dull too.”

 

“That should be okay,” Alex slows down to stand in front of Lena. “Let's worry about one thing at a time okay?” Lena hums in response.

 

“I don't understand how you do it.” Alex looks at the sitting girl questioningly. “I just mean, I haven't seen you stop once since she was brought in. I know I'm a workaholic but you're something else Alex.”

 

Alex takes a minute to think before she speaks, “I could ask you the same thing. You work harder than me. But I guess I just keep going because if she doesn't get better I don't know what I would do. We got to try everything don't we?”

 

“I just wish she was here she would know what to do.”

 

“Me too, but don't sell yourself short Lena. You're the only one I've seen able to keep up with all of her science and math rants. If she can’t be here I'm glad you are. We couldn’t help her without you.” Alex says sincerely.

 

“I couldn't do it without you either Alex.” Lena smiles at her when she hears a familiar voice from behind. She turns to see Clark in his Superman outfit walking towards them. Lena gets up and hugs him tightly whispering in his ear a kryptonian thank you.  He responds in kind.

 

“Hey Clark! I'm glad you could make it.” Alex says motioning to the bench for him to take a seat so they can get started. Alex pulls one of the sun lamps closer and turns it on.

 

“No problem, you both know I'd do anything for her.” Turning to Lena he says “I’m sorry that night didn't work out like you had hoped Lena.”

 

“You knew?” Alex rolls up Clark’s sleeve.

 

He chuckles a little, “Yeah I did. Lena here wanted to make sure she got the customs of Kryptonian marriage right.” At this Lena blushes.

 

“You didn't think knew?” Alex says with fake offendedness.

 

“No I didn't, and I know you would have given it way if I left you and Kara alone for more than two minutes.” Lena added.

 

“Not true!” Alex finds a vain and cleans the area on Clark's arm.

 

“Yes, true! I told you I was going to surprise Kara with a date night one time and you told her I was going take her out!” Lena laughs.

 

“In my defense she was confused as to why I asked J’onn to cover for her when a new bad guy came to town. What was I supposed to tell her, she had a night off?”

 

“Yes!” All three break into laughter.

 

“Well I didn't want to lie to my sister!”

 

“And now you know why I didn't tell you!”

 

“Okay I get it now. Well at least I know now.” Lena shoots Alex a look who throws her hands up in self-defense. “I promise I won't tell her when she wakes up!”

 

“Good. That's my job.”

 

Clark coughs a little to grab the two women's attention. “Are we going to do this thing now?”

 

“Oh yeah,” Alex grabs the needle putting it on Clark’s arm. “So this needle Lena created should be able to pierce your skin. It's made with kryptonite encased in lead. We haven't tested it on anyone so we don't know if it will work or not. If you feel sick Clark, let us know and will stop okay?” Clark nods at Alex telling her to continue.

Alex punctures Clark’s skin and blood starts to flow out of his right arm into a container. “Wow, I've never been able to do that without blowing out my powers.” Clark comments.

 

“I’m hoping to develop more medical equipment to help other aliens so they don't have to be weakened to get basic care.” Lena adds.

 

“So that hospital is actually going to happen?” Clark asks.

 

“That's the plan if we can get equipment for it.”

 

“That's amazing to hear Lena.” Clark smiles at her.

 

When Clark first met Lena he assumed she was similar to her brother judging her before she even got the chance to prove her worth. It took more than saving every alien in National City to convince him she was different. Kara would call him up some day to talk about what they've been up to and somehow the conversation always ended with Kara talking about Lena. How wonderful she is how she not only saved every alien but she also knows her Chinese order by heart. Kara understood why her cousin was worried for her because who wouldn't be if you best friend turn out to be a xenophobic serial killer. But Lena wasn't like that. The first time Kara invited both Clark and Lena to thanksgiving was eventful. He still had his doubts about her. It wants until he saw the way Lena looked at Kara his opinion of her started to change because Lois looked at him that way.

A few months after thanksgiving Kara held an ultimate game night where Clark was able to give Lena the most threatening shovel talk that even Alex or J’onn couldn't match. After that they slowly started to grow on each other and Clark finally stopped kicking himself for leaving his cousin because if he didn't Kara would have never had Lena. And as Kara once said to him, “she makes me feel alive in a way flying can't and at home the way krypton was.” He had faith in her because Kara did.

 

“So I'm only going to take two pints and we'll see how it works.” Alex removes the needle from Clark's arm and watches the wound heal. “You need to stay under the sun laps for at least an hour before we'll let you go. We can't have Superman just falling from the sky”

 

“Yeah that would give new meaning to crash landing.” Clark chuckle. “Could I sit with Kara while I wait?”

 

“Yes, just be careful not to faint as you walk there.” Clark stands. “She in the next room over. Lena can show you.”

 

Lena walks Clark to Kara’s room and gets him a seat so can sit with the sunlamps on him. “I'm going to go help Alex. Stay as long as you like.” Clark gives Lena his best smile as she walks out of the room.

 

Lena stands in the doorway of the medical bay watching Alex clean the needle.

“It’s going to work, right?”

 

Putting the needle back into the container it came in, Alex looks at Lena. “I’m not going to lie to you Lena, I don’t know. I know that's not good enough for you but it’s the truth we just have to wait and see.” She takes the container filled with Clark’s blood and walks into Kara’s room with Lena trailing behind her.

 

_*****_

_“Shoot! I ran out of canvas.” Kara mutters to herself. It was around 2 in the afternoon at her shared apartment with Lena who was working on a business report on the couch._

 

_Looking up from her computer Lena saw a grumpy Kara huff as she sat next to her. “Why don't you go and buy some?”_

 

_“I don't feel like going out.” Kara responded as an idea popped into her head. “Could I paint on your back? I mean it's just that it's large enough that I could and you know it’s flat.”_

 

_Lena seems a little bemused but went with it. “Yeah that would be okay as long as I can work on this report too.”_

 

_“Yeah that would be fine.” Kara got up off the couch to fetch some paint and a cup of water._

 

_“Okay then, just tell me how you want me.”_

 

_“On the floor is fine right by the window.”_

 

_Lena gets up and takes her tank top off leaving her in only her boyshorts. She takes her laptop and situates herself on the floor lying on her stomach. Kara lays down the paint and water on the right side of Lena and grabs a brush. When she comes back she straddles Lena's hips._

 

_“Is this okay? I'm not too heavy am I?” Kara asked worriedly. Sometimes if she wasn't careful she could crush someone._

 

_“You're perfect Kar,”_

 

_Smiling at this Kara says “good! Fair warning though it might be a little cold and tickle some.”_

 

_Dipping her brush in water then a dark blue she slowly moves it across Lena's back who shivers at the touch. “If you get cold let me know okay?” Lena just hums as she finishes the report and closes her laptop. Pushing it way she lays her head on her arms relaxing under Kara._ It's such an odd feeling to be painted on _, Lena thought. Feeling the worries of the day wash away loosed Lena up enough to drift into a light nap. When she awoke Kara was still painting. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Kara’s brows furrowed together in concentration._

 

_Lena loved moments like this. Being able to look at her beautiful girlfriend when she was unaware was breathtaking. The light from the setting sun resting on her face made her look more like an angel than she already was._

 

_Lena felt the brushing on her back stop. “Did you finish?”_

 

_“Not yet. I still have to put the finishing touches on then I'll be done.” Kara’s eyes caught Lena's own, “what are you thinking about?”_

 

_“How lucky I am to have you.” Kara blushed and didn't know what to say because she felt the same. “Can I ask you something?”_

 

_“Always Lee, what is it?”_

 

_“How did you learn to paint?” As soon as the words left her mouth Kara stopped for a moment not quite expecting to hear it._

 

_“Eliza taught me when I first got here.” She paused to collect her thoughts and continued painting on Lena’s back. “I- I had lots of trouble with controlling my powers. My strength especially.” Kara moves her brush in a circular motion. “I would take the doors off the hinges and break the steps on my way down. This one time I flooded the house trying to get a glass of water. Eliza had finally had it so she taught me to paint. Jeremiah made me a paint brush that I couldn't break. Painting helped me focus on control, if I wanted the paint to get on the canvas I had to put it there. It helped me control my hearing too. Eliza once told me that a good painter is able to quite the world around them and focus only on what they want.” Kara dips the brush in water and wipes it on her shirt before dipping it in white._

 

_“What was the first thing you painted on earth?”_

 

_“Krypton.” Kara said without hesitation. “Well it was more like the second or third thing I painted but I didn’t want to forget.” Kara says softly “some night I would stay up trying to paint my mother and father, trying to capture the light in their eyes. It never looked right, there was something missing every time I tried.” Kara’s movements slow to a standstill, “I think I was afraid I would forget them so I tried every day for months to get their image just right.”_

 

_Kara takes a deep breath to calm herself before she continues. “My mother was the one who taught me to draw. It was all mechanical drawing of building and plants. My father, he taught me about the stars and planets. What kinds of plants were edible and which could kill you if you touched them.”_

 

_This was the first time that Kara had ever spoken these memories allowed to anyone, ever. Not even Alex or Clark had heard this. She never felt like they cared enough to really help her carry the weight of Krypton. Kara had missed her chance with Clarke and Alex was well Alex, but Lena was here now. Just looking at Lena below her she saw nothing but comfort and understanding. There was no rush to spill her guts. No demand of answers she was not willing to give. They promised to be open books to each other and Kara was tired of carrying all the weight of Krypton alone._

 

_Moving off of Lena to lie beside her Kara continued. “I was going to be the youngest one on the Science Glide.”_

 

_“Real?” Lean asks._

 

_“Yeah, they didn’t allow anyone under the age of 17.”_

 

_“How old would you have been?”_

 

_“Uh, about fifteen. It would have been soon if I could figure out how electromagnetic radiation effects particle movement.”_

 

_“Wow, Kar I didn’t know you were such a prodigy. That’s amazing!” Lean smiles widely at Kara. “You could help me develop tech that helps you. I think you would better than me at it.”_

_“Impossible. Lena you are so smart and creative I couldn't even do half the things you do.”_

 

_“Maybe so, but I think it would be fun working with you on stuff. You with the science and me to bend it to make what we want.”_

 

_“I like that idea.” Kara smiles at Lean and moves to capture her lips. When Kara kissed Lena she felt at home. “I want to teach you Kryptonese, Lee. I want to share more of my world with you.”_

 

_“I would love nothing more than to learn all you know Kara. It would be an honor.” Lena looks at Kara who has tears in her eyes. Lena takes her left hand and wipes the tear away. They gaze at each other for a moment. “Can I get up now?”_

 

_“Yeah, wait here and I’ll take a picture and show you.” Kara gets up and returns faster than Lena can fully miss her. Kara takes a picture then leans down to show Lena. It’s a beautiful skyline of what Lena can only imagine is Kara’s view from her home on krypton._

 

_“Kara, it beautiful. I love it.”_

 

_“Thank you.”_

 

_“Is it?” Lena doesn't even have to finish her thought because Kara already knows what she is asking._

 

_“Yeah, it was the view from the balcony actually.”_

 

_“Now I know why you love the balcony at my office.” It reminds Kara of home._

 

_“Yeah.” Kara says. She moves to clean up the paint and brushes, helping Lena stand so she can go wash off her back. Before Lena heads to the bathroom she drags Kara into a soft kiss. A kiss that says ‘thank you’._

 

_After Lena showers and they eat leftover takeout for dinner she wraps Kara in her arms as they drift off to sleep, with the promise to share the language Kara hasn’t spoken in far too long._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ch title is a song by delta rae


	5. One and only

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally included that Whitney Houston song in this nice n gay chapter. ur going to love it promise

 

The next few days blended into one. With Clark showing up around 10am each day, to donate his blood, and leaving at 11. James, Winn and J’onn all stopped by to spend some time with Kara whenever Lena was not in the room. If she was it made her feel less alone in this mess. She finally had friend and family that had her back, for that Lena was grateful.

 

The treatment seemed like it was working because on day five Kara was able to breath on her own. The hardest part of this whole ordeal for Lena is the waiting and uncertainty. She's a business woman and the CEO of a major company she's used to being in the know. But this waiting is draining her of everything she is.

 

In the past week Lena has come up with at least a hundred new ideas to better protect Kara when she's Supergirl. None of which are actually practical, most may involve the use bubble wrap and or pillows.)

 

It isn't until day thirteen that Lena notices something strange.

 

Lying on the left side of Kara like she normally does if she sleeps, Lena sees a faint movement on the right side of the bed. She thinks she just needs sleep because weird things start to happen when you stay up for almost 48 hours trying to run your company from a far. Lena sees it happen again so she slides off the bed and walks around to take Kara's hand in hers.

 

That's when Lena _feels_ it. A twitch. Almost unnoticeable unless you were paying attention. Like someone rubbing a feather on your arm.

 

It happens again and Lena doesn't believe it. _It can't be!_ Looking up at Kara’s face she sees her eyes move under her eyelids.

 

“ALEX!” Lena yells.

 

“ALEX FUCKING DANVERS GET YOUR ASS IN HERE NOW!” Lena yells louder.

 

Alex comes rushing in from the medical bay, “what is it?”

 

“She moved,” Lena glances behind her look at Alex’s astonished face.

 

“What?”

 

“Kara, her hand, it- it _moved_ Alex!”

 

Alex walks over to stand next to Lena who gives her Kara's hand. Lena then takes her right hand to tuck a strand of hair behind Kara's ear. “I’m here Kara, darling.”

 

“Oh my god!” Alex feels Kara move against her hand. She starts rubbing her thumb across Kara's hand. “Say something else.”

 

Lena starts talking to Kara hoping she will open her eyes. “Kara baby we're here. Wake up please,” tears start to spill out of Lena's eyes.

 

“Kara you need to wake up now come on.” Alex adds.

 

Lena lays her forehead on to Kara's and whisper “I need my Danvers hero back.” Then brokenly “please Kar,”

 

A soft gravelly voice mumbles something incoherent. “What was that,” Alex asked.

 

The voice says a little louder “Lena,” and her open eyes find Lena crying.

 

“Kara you came back,” Lena kisses her forehead then her nose and finally a soft kiss on her lips. Lena pulls back to really look at Kara. Her eyes look tired and face a little sunken, completely unlike her usual bubbly self. A part of Lena wasn't sure if she would ever be able to see those shining blue eyes ever again.

 

“Hey Kar, you gave us quite the scare.” Kara glances behind Lena to see Alex who now stands at the foot of her bed with a hand on her right leg. “We were worried for a minute that Rao wanted you back but I'm glad to see he changed his mind.” Kara laughs a little at that and looks back at Lena.

 

“Hey,” Lena whispers holding Kara’s hand tight in her left one. She smooths the younger girl's hair back.

 

“Hey” Kara chokes out. Her voice sounds rougher. Lena misses it. She forgot how good it sounds.

 

They just stare at each other for a moment then Lena cups Kara’s face leaning into her. Smiling Lena closes the distance kissing Kara again. It's soft and sweet filled with salty tears and love.

 

Pulling away Lena tells her, “I've missed you so much Kara.” Lena puts her forehead next to hers “I love you and I can't lose you.”

 

“M’not going anywhere Lee, nothing can take me from you. Not even Rao.” Kara feels Lena's tears fall on her face.

 

“Good because I want to ask you something,” Lena pulls back and looks hesitantly at Kara who is confused because she just woke up from god knows how long and Lena is looking at her scared.

 

“Not even a minute after I wake up Lee, and you want to ask me something?” Kara smirks seeing Lena fidget with blank it. “Okay what is it.” she ask encouraging Lena to continue.

 

“I, Rao,” Lena’s never been the religious type but if you spend long enough with someone you start picking up on their mannerisms. “I Lena Luthor would like to join the mighty House of El, if you’ll have me Kara Zor-El.” A tear slips out. “There may not be a matrix to match us but I think the universe did a pretty good job of keeping us together wouldn’t you agree?” Kara nods her head in agreement. “I want your body and mind forever, and I want you to have mine. I know Kryptonians mate for life so I would love for you to be my one and only. It would mean everything to be with you until I can be no longer, it would bring me great pleasure if you would also be mine.” She takes a big breath and adds in Kryptonian “ _so will you marry me Kara Zor-El?_ ”

 

It's now Kara who cries at Lena's words. She never thought she would hear kryptonian vows said so sweetly. She _really_ never thought Lena would be saying them minutes after she woke up.

 

Holding Lena's vulnerable gaze Kara smiles and says “yes.” More tears fall from her eyes, “yes Lena, I will marry you.” Lena leans forward again and kisses her with more passion than before.

 

After a moment Lena pulls back with a similar big smile wiping the tears falling from her now fiancée’s face. “Thank Rao! Now let me give you my crest.” Lena moves to the opposite side of Kara’s bead with all her stuff and fishes out the box with the ring. Finding what she’s looking for Lena pulls out a small lead lined box engraved with her house crest on top and Kryptonian writing underneath. It looks like the regular Supergirl symbol but instead of the S there is a circle with a line on the right side and a smaller circle on the left of the line. According to Kara it is the Kryptonian letter L.  

 

“So that's what the box was for?” Kara states.

 

“Yeah, I couldn’t have you peaking before I was ready,” Lena chuckles and opens the box it to show Kara.

 

“Oh Lena, it's beautiful!” The ring was a black and gold infinity shape with an emerald stone in the middle surrounded by blue diamonds that matched Kara's eyes.

 

Lena slips the ring on to Kara's finger. “I had Clark and Maggie help me pick it out. It's green because I know it reminds you of my eyes and blue because it reminds me of your eyes, and I always want you to have a piece of me-- a piece of us, wherever you are.”

 

“Thank you, Lee.” Kara sighs contently “I love it. I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

They look at each other just taking it all in when Alex coughs. “That was beautiful and sappy,” wiping away a single tear she adds “but now we need to talk okay?” They both nod at Alex and Lena pulls a seat up next to Kara and holds her injured hand.

 

That's when Kara notices she can't hear Lena's heartbeat and notices the needle in her arm. “Why don’t I have my powers?”

 

“You blew them out trying to save everyone at the airport.” Alex sees Kara is confused and continues, “You’ve been in a coma for thirteen days, and memory loss is common. You should slowly start to get that back.” There are a million thoughts going through Kara’s head but she cannot voice a single one. “We caught the bad guys who did this Kara. Your left arm, knee and right shoulder got injured.” Taking a breath, “and there was a close call with kryptonite near your heart.

 

“You practically human now until your powers come back. That's why we have needles in you giving you pain medicine so it doesn't overwhelm you.” Alex rubs Kara’s right leg. “We think you have to get adrenaline in your system to jump start your powers.” Kara nods in understanding. “But,” Alex hesitates because Kara is not going to like this, “we can't risk you getting hurt any more than you are right now so getting that adrenaline the old fashioned way is a no go.”

 

“So, then when can I try and get them back?” Kara asks.

 

“Not for a week at least. Lena, Winn and I are working on a way to help you that doesn't involve you moving a lot considering you left knee is shattered.”

 

“Okay,” Kara was going to hate to be in bed for a whole week. A whole week! She could handle monsters and fire breathing aliens but being restricted to a bed without her powers just might be the end of her. This was going to be one long week.

 

“I'm glad you back Kara, I've missed you.” Alex moves to kiss Kara's forehead.

 

“I've missed you to sis,”

 

“I'll go tell everyone you okay. Make sure that one,” pointing to Lena, “gets some sleep and I will be back in the morning to do a full checkup.”

 

“Thank you Alex,” Kara says watching her sister walk out the door. She turns to face Lena, “so we're engaged!”

 

Lena laughs “why yes we are.”

 

“You’re my fiancée! Oh gosh that sound so good.” Kara rubs her uninjured hand over her face smiling like a fool.

 

Lena hums in agreement watching her fiancée be her adorable cute self.

 

There's a beat of silence before Kara removes her hand to jokingly ask Lena “did you miss me?”

 

“Like you miss home cooked pot stickers,”

 

“Wow that's a lot,” Kara's eyes widen comically because that _was_ a lot. Nothing could beat the taste to Lena’s home cooked potstickers. It was one of the few things she knew how to make.

Suddenly overcome with guilt Kara looks away from Lena and whispers “I'm sorry,” as tears fill her eyes.

 

“You have nothing to be sorry for. Kara you were just doing your job” Lena holds Kara’s hand tightly, putting the other one to Kara’s face making her look at her. “I can't fault you for something that is out of your control.” Lena reassures her.

 

“But I'm still sorry for the hurt you felt. I know it must have been hard and I'm sorry for that.” Kara is barely holding Lena’s eye contact.

 

“Well it's nothing I couldn't handle. I had some help from our friends.” she shrugs, “I'm just glad you awake now.”

 

“Well, know that I will always, always come back to you Lena. It will have to be Rao himself that stops me because nothing else would be able to keep me from you.” She takes Lena's hand in hers despite the discomfort. “You make what I do worthwhile Lena. Knowing I can come home to you and sleep in your arms makes fighting people who try to hurt others worth it. You make my job worth it.”

 

“Kara,” Lena gets up out of her chair and runs her fingers down Kara's face. “I guess I can't change your mind about being a superhero huh?”

 

“Nope,” Kara pops out smiling.

 

“Good, I wouldn’t want you to change a thing. Except maybe listening to Alex and J’onn before you rush into the action.”

 

“But Lena,” Kara says deadpan “the people,”

 

“But Kara you,” Lena retorts leaning her head forward.

 

“Okay, okay I'll try but no promises!”

 

“That's good enough for me,” Lena touches her nose to Kara's who tries to catch Lena's lips. With a smirk on her face Lena kisses Kara.

 

When Kara finally convinces Lena to sleep she curls up next to Kara on the bed sleeping better than she had in forever.

 

*****

_Lena finally got off work at 10pm two hours later than she wanted to. She just want to get home to Kara and sleep. It was a long day of negotiating with old white men who didn't want to invest in her new alien tech. It was to help doctors to operate on them without causing harm. The investors didn't understand._

 

 _As Lena walked up to her apartment door she heard a song she faintly recognized coming through._ What are you up Kara? _With a smile on her face Lena opened the door to see Kara dancing in the living room wearing one of Lena's old band t-shirt and seafoam green boy shorts, singing into a nonexistent microphone in her hand._

 

I've done alright up 'til now  
It's the light of day that shows me how  
And when the night falls  
Loneliness calls

 

_What caught Lena's attention the most was Kara’s hips moving with the beat of the song. Her voice was sweet and warm melting away any and all of Lena's troubles._

 

Oh! I wanna dance with somebody  
I wanna feel the heat with somebody  
Yeah! I wanna dance with somebody  
With somebody who loves me

 

_When the chorus repeats Kara notices Lena standing at the doorway staring at her with a smirk. Kara, putting on a show, sways over to her and grabs her hands dragging her to the living room to dance. Lena kicks off her heels and begrudgingly dances with Kara._

 

I've been in love and lost my senses  
Spinning through the town  
Sooner or later the fever ends  
And I wind up feeling down

 

_Slowly Lena starts to loosen up allowing Kara to move her hands and her hips. She can't believe they are dancing in their living room to a WHITNEY HOUSTON song. Lena never thought this could be her life._

 

I need a girl who'll take a chance  
On a love that burns hot enough to last  
So when the night falls  
My lonely heart calls

 

_Kara squats and runs in place with her hands out shaking her head.  A real laugh makes its way out of Lena when Kara puts her hands up in the air and  starts dramatically dancing around her._

 

Somebody who somebody who.... somebody who loves me,  
Somebody who somebody who... to hold me in her arms.

 

_Kara pulls Lena closer to her. Bring her forehead down to Lena's she smiles like a fool. Lena thinks they are going to kiss but Kara keeps singing, her eyes never leaving Lena's._

 

I need a girl who'll take a chance,  
On a love that burns hot enough to last.  
So when the night falls,  
My lonely heart calls

 

_Lena notices Kara is changing the pronouns in the song to fit them. Kara’s voice is light and sweet and the vibrato of her voice was just beautiful. Lena was falling more in love with this woman by the second._

 

Oh! I wanna dance with somebody  
I wanna feel the heat with somebody  
Yeah! I wanna dance with somebody  
With somebody who loves me

 

_As the song starts on the last verses Kara lets go of Lena's waist and takes a hold her hands pulling her closer then pushing her away.  Every time their faces get closer Kara asks,_

 

Don't you wanna dance with me baby?  
  
With somebody who loves me  
  


_Lena just  nods laughing so hard her sides hurt._

  
Don't you wanna dance?  
Say you wanna dance?  
Don't you wanna dance?

 

_The look Kara is giving Lena makes her feel warmth from her head to her toes._

 

Don't you wanna dance?  
Say you wanna dance?  
Don't you wanna dance?

 

_Kara spins Lena around and dips her taking her breath away._

 

With somebody who loves me

 

_As the last line finishes Kara pulls Lena into a passionate kiss. When they separate Kara smiles at Lena like everything is right in the world and in this moment Lena Luthor was completely and irrevocably in love with Kara Zor-El Danvers and she knew Kara felt the same way._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that proposal was pretty good huh? let me know what you think 
> 
> ps: id be lying if i said i didnt watch youtube vids of melissa singing on glee (again) to 
> 
> ring: https://www.allurez.com/rings/engagement-rings/infinity-diamond-engagement-ring-with-band-14k-white-gold-0.65ct/bpid/14184/65?Refid=nextag&utm_source=nextag&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=product  
> ch title song by adele  
> tumblr i-am-kantkiss-neverclean


	6. I cry out but nothing comes now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> James makes an appearance

Alex walks in the next morning with Eliza to see Lena sleeping on Kara's bed with an arm around her waist. They look peaceful unlike the last time Alex walked in on them.

“They look so peaceful,” Eliza whispers. She and Alex walk closer to the bed. Kara stirs and opens her eyes giving the two women a soft smile. “Good morning Kara. How are you feeling?”

“Good. Everything hurts and I can't fly so other than that it's all good.” Kara voice is laced with sarcasm and a pinch of bitterness.

“We need to change your bandages. We can't have a mighty Super get an infection.” Alex jokes.

“Can it wait? I don't want to wake Lena.” Kara motions towards her fiancée, who snuggles her head further into Kara's neck.

“I'll come back in 15 to change those bandages weather you like it or not.” Eliza points at her.

“Okay,” Kara agrees and Alex and Eliza head out. “Wait! Could you bring food when you come back please? I super hungry.”

“I'll text Maggie to grab us breakfast. Cinnamon rolls?” Alex asks Kara.

“Three please.” Her sister knew her well.

Alex pulls out her phone to ask Maggie to stop by Noonan’s to grab breakfast for them.

Kara thinks it's weird not being able to hear Lena's heartbeat. She misses the steady rhythm that calms her. One thing she doesn't miss however, is accidentally overhearing everyone's conversations.

Letting her mind drift Kara wonders how James is doing since he was there at the airport she hopes he will stop by today. She doesn't really remember much about what happened. Alex had told her some of what happened but there were still a lot of questions Kara had.

Lena stirred away practically hearing Kara think. It was like her own little superpower. Snuggling her head into Kara's neck Lena grumbles out a muted “morning,” and hugs Kara tight.

Kara moves her right hand to Lena's back and rubs it as Lena leans her head back to look at her newly engaged fiancée.

“Good morning my sleepy fiancée,” Kara whispers.

Lena hums and moves to kiss Kara. It was meant to be quick but Kara deepens it causing Lena to bite at her lower lip. Kara moans then pulls back needing to breath. She lays her head on Lena's. “Whatcha thinking about?”

“Nothing much,” Kara answers.

Alex walks in with the food Maggie brought on her way to work. The three eat for a few minutes and talked. Then Alex starts to changes the dressings on Kara's wounds. This makes Lena a little queasy so she excuses herself to go work on something in medical bay leaving the two women alone.

“How are you feeling?” Alex asks walking up to Kara’s left arm changing the dressing.

“Pretty good I guess. I mean other than not having powers everything is pretty peachy.” Kara huffs.

“The crinkle says otherwise.” Alex point to her forehead.

“Uggh. I don't like that crinkle!”

Alex moves to change the bandage on Kara's leg. Kara doesn't know how to feel yet it's a lot to process and she doesn't remember anything.

“Alex, I don't know.” Kara fiddles with her the edge of the blanket. “It's wired not having my powers. I know this isn't the first time but it is when I'm hurt. How do humans do this? Get injured and heal? I think I'm going to go mad sitting here.” She huffs again. “And I don't even remember what happened!” Kara tries to wave her hands in the air to emphasize her point but she hisses when she moves her right arm higher than a foot. “Rao! How did Maggie do it?” Kara refers to when Maggie got shot a few years ago.

“Well Kara, it's going to take some time. We're working on something so you can get your powers back. We don't want to put you in any unnecessary risk.” Finishing her leg Alex movies to work on her sister's shoulder. “With your leg, there could be permanent damages,”

“You don't know that! It could fix itself easily.” Kara interjects.

“We could throw you out the window and hope you fly. Would you want to try that?”  Alex offers.

Kara hangs her head and softly mutters “no.”

“Okay then, we're going to do it my way so the hero here will be good as new. After a week is over then we will try to get you out and on your feet barring any complications. Okay?”

“Okay,” Kara knows she fighting a losing battle.

Alex finishes with her shoulder then silently asks if she can change the bandage on her chest. Kara obliges.

“You know, Lena rarely left your side while you were out,” Alex whispers. “She cried for days. I don't think I've ever seen someone cry that much before. I thought she might pass out from dehydration.” Alex looks at Kara who looks so small. Ale was supposed to take care of her sister and she hasn't done it as well as she would have liked to.

“Alex,” Kara’s eyes are filled with tears.

“J’onn worked around the clock to get the Bad Guys. James took over patrol of National City so people stayed safe. Winn tracked down all the kryptonite in the city.” Alex’s hands start to shake as she finishes.

Kara takes her hand in her own. “And what about you?”

“I, I saved you. I should have tried harder to prevent this but I couldn't. I'm sorry,” Kara opens her mouth to say something but Alex stops her. “Don't say it's my fault. I know it's not. None of us could have prevented this. It's just having you gone for thirteen day hurt all of us. Just know we are all here for you okay?”

Kara pulls Alex closer to giver a hug as best she could.

“It takes time okay? Patience isn't your best attribute just know I'm here for you okay?”

“Thank you Alex, for everything.”

The room is heavy and Alex changes their topic of conversation to something more light. Taking a seat next to Kara she asks “so you're engaged now how does it feel?”

Kara smiles brightly thankful for the change in subject. “Oh Rao, Alex it's amazing!”

Alex laughs at her sister's enthusiasm. “Apparently she had it planned for weeks. She was originally going to do it during movie night but in my opinion it wasn't cliché enough.”

“When you and Maggie finally get engaged it better be the sappiest thing my eyes have ever seen. And I'm dating Lena,”

“I don't think I'm going to be able to top it. You're engaged to the queen of sappy.” Alex chuckles.

Hearing a light knock on the door the sisters turn to see James standing in the doorway with something in his hand giving them a small smile. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, yeah I'm all done here.” Alex places up the dirty bandages and walks towards the door. “Be careful Kara. Don't pop any of the stitches.” Alex looks at James and smiles before leaving.

James pulls up a chair to the right side of Kara's bed. “I'm glad to see your awake now Kara.”

“Me too.” She smiles at him. “What are you doing here? Did Lena send you?” Kara laughs.

“No, no I just wanted to check up on my favorite sidekick.” James knew she wasn't his sidekick but it was a joke between them because they worked together so often the media was trying to claim one of them was a sidekick to the other, which was completely untrue if anything they were more like the power rangers than Batman and Robin. “Also thought you could use some company. I know how much you hate doing nothing.”

“James you are amazing! So what did you bring to entertain you favorite sidekick?” Kara asked with a raised eyebrow. A trait she picked up from Lena.

“I was thinking scrabble and a movie. How does that sound?” He puts the game on the bed.

“That sounds amazing! What movie were you thinking?”

“Your choice, you are the injured one between us.”

“Ooh The Devil Wears Prada!”

“Good choice. Let's play a game of scrabble then we can watch the movie okay?” Kara nods and James opens the game and gets it set up.

“So how are James? I'm kind of tired of talking about me for right now.” James lays down the word ‘Happy’

“I'm good. I got a few cuts and bruises from that night but nothing major.” Kara lays down ‘Prize’

“Alex told me what happened to me but I can't remember any of it. What happened to you?”

Chuckling to himself James says, “I tackled the first guy-”

“The one built like The Rock?”

“Yeah that one. I used that new trick we we're working on with Alex. He fell so fast.”

“Oh my gosh! That's fantastic! I'm glad that it worked.”

“Me too! The other one, Alex was able to take down all by herself.” James was quite impressed with how fast Alex moved from the first guy to the second. “You would have been so proud of her Kara.”

Kara was glad her sister could handle herself. Kara had seen Alex grow so much since she first joined with the DEO. If Kara didn't have her powers Alex could totally beat her in a fight. “I'm already proud of her. She's grown so much.”

“Yeah she has.” James laid down ‘Sippy’ and noticed the ring on Kara's left hand. “So Lena finally asked you? I was wondering when she was going to do that.”

Kara lifted her left hand enough to lay it over her stomach and showed James the ring. “Yeah she did it like a soon as I woke up.” Her eyes widen as she says it.

“She has nice taste.” 

“Yeah she does,” Kara stairs at the ring.

They continue to talk more and James catches Kara up on all the missed action that has gone on in National City. He assures her it wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle. Kara ends up winning like she normally does. When it's over James pulls up Netflix on Lena's laptop and they watch The Devil Wears Prada. Part way through the movie Kara starts to nod off so James leaves her to rest telling her he will be back later.

 

_Kara awakes into black nothingness with a faint red glow illuminating somewhere in front of her. She can’t see where its coming from._

_“Kara Zor-El,” a deep voice echoes._

_Kara moves after the sound she thinks is coming from behind her but she can’t be sure. She is running to find a wall, there are none. Kara tries to fly up to see if there is an end to this darkness but her feet never leave the ground._

_“Kara,” the voice repeats vibrating through her._

_Kara tries to speak but her throat won’t let her. She wants to scream to the heavens but nothing will come out. She turns around running past where she started. Kara sees the red light grow into a spot just out of her reach._

_“Kara,” the voice increases in pitch sounding faintly familiar._

_She tries to scream. Only dust comes out. Kara is beyond frustrated she wants nothing more than to get out. “I'm here!” She shouts in her head. “I'm right here!”_

_The red light brightens encompassing her in its glow. Kara turns to look behind her and sees nothing. Still she runs towards the red light she knows she will never be able to touch._

_“Kara, honey please.” The closer she get to the light the more she feels like she knows the voice that's speaking but can't place it._

_“Kara don't leave me!” The voice shouts. It has the same timber that Lena’s voice does. “Kara!” This time Kara knows it belongs to Lena._

_“Lena!” Kara is still chasing the light which is now inches from her fingers. “Lena I’m right here!”_

_Just as Kara is about to leap to grab the light it moves faster and she falls on her face. Kara would chase the light in a thousand life times if it meant she would see Lena again. Kara would never stop trying to get back to her. Her home, her rock, her love, Kara would go to hell and back for Lena._

_“Kara,” Lena’s voices sounded like a prayer whispered out begging for her to come home._

“LENA, don't go! I'm right here!” Kara yells in her bed tossing and turning.

Lena, who is sitting on the left side of Kara, closes her laptop and puts her hand over Kara’s. “Kara, darling wake up please.”

Kara shoots up out of breath looking around the room. It takes a second for her to recognize that she is at the DEO and not at home where she wants to be. Slowly her eyes drift to find Lena looking at her worriedly.

“Kar, honey it was just a dream.” Lena moves the laptop to the floor so she can sit on the bed next to Kara. “You're okay now.” Kara nods and scoots into Lena's open arms.

Lena rubs her back and kisses the top of Kara's head whispering soothing words to her. “Do you want to talk about it?” Kara shakes her head no pushing further into Lena’s neck. “That's okay. But I'm here if you want to okay?” She nods.

After a few minutes Kara's breathing slows down and Lena softly asks “was it a nightmare?”

Kara hums a yes.

“You know it’s completely normal after you went through Kar. It’s nothing we haven’t gone through before.”

Kara picks at the hem of Lena’s shirt before glancing up at her “It's just they've never been this bad before.”

“Well you did go through something more traumatic than you have before. Maybe that’s it.” Lena suggests.

“I don’t know,”

“Kar you know I’m not going to push you to tell me anything but if you want to talk I’m here okay? You’re never alone.”

Kara hums and Lena kiss the top of her head. “Can you read to me?”

“Of course darling.” Lena grabs her phone and pulls up one of their shared favorites and reads to her. Not even ten pages in and Kara starts to drift off.

Lena tries to wiggle herself out of Kara’s embrace but the girl just hugs her closer whispering “don’t leave,” and who was Lena to argue?

So Lena just holds Kara tighter and tells her “I’m not going anywhere.” The two drift off in a dreamless sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm kind of running out of ideas for cute fluffy flashbacks so if there is anything you want to see let me know. comments are always appreciated  
> find me on tumblr i-am-kantkiss-neverclean 
> 
> title- helium by sia


	7. I miss you

In the morning Kara wakes to an empty bed and starts freaking out. Lena was with her when she fell asleep but now she isn’t. Kara sees her stuff is still here which is good but _where is she?_ _Is she okay? Did she leave me? Am I dead?_

Kara is breathing so hard her monitors start to go off beeping wildly. Alex comes running in. “Kara what’s wrong?”

The younger girl is grasping at her chest heaving. “I--I can’t,”

Alex rushes over and starts rubbing circles on her sister’s back trying to calm her down. “Breathe Kara. In and out, I’m going to count down from ten and I want you to breath in and out on each number okay?” Kara nodded as Alex started counting down.

By the time Alex got to one her breathing was under control. Alex was still rubbing her back when she asked “what happened? You haven’t had a panic attack since you were little.”

“I--I” Kara takes a deep breath trying to calm herself down. “Where’s Lena?”

Alex takes a second to look at her sister, her hair sticking to her sweaty forehead, eyes pleading. She looks so much like the little girl who showed up out of nowhere on a Saturday not so long ago.

Alex tucks a strand of Kara’s hair behind her ear. “She is in the lounge on a phone call with China. Something about an investor threatening to back out. I didn’t ask.” Still seeing the worry in Kara’s eyes she adds “She’s fine Kara. Told me to keep an eye on you because of last night. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I don’t really have a choice now do I?” Kara gestures to Alex who is now sitting on the side of her bed facing her.

“I mean you do, always but seeing as you just had a panic attack because your girlf- I mean, fiancée isn’t here I think it might be healthy for you to talk about it.” Kara opens her mouth to protest but Alex continues, “And before you say you don’t need to, may I remind you about that time you didn’t talk to any about that man you couldn’t save in a fire. You literally almost vaporized Winn because he asked you if he could clean the suit. I’m not saying you need to talk about it but that’s exactly what I’m saying, so spill.”

“Shouldn’t we have some ice cream or something?” Kara asked.

“After you talk we’ll have ice cream. You’ll just eat it all and avoid questions.” Alex gave her a look “you know I’m right.”

“Rao I hate it when you’re right.” Kara scooted up on the bed lying on the pillows so she didn't have to use as much effort. She takes a look at Alex before looking down and playing with the blanket over her. “I think I had a nightmare last night but it was different than the others I’ve had.” Her brows furrow deep in thought.

“How so?”

Kara tells Alex all of what she can remember. The darkness, the running, the voice. And Lena.

“Wow,” Kara glances up at Alex. “Well that explains your panic attack. I’m guessing you haven’t told Lena have you?”

Kara shakes her head no. “I just, she seems to be doing well and I don’t want to mess it up. I don't want her to worry any more than she has too.”

“When has that ever stopped you before?”

“I just uggh, I don’t know.” Kara huffs out covering her face with her right hand. “I'm scared I'm going to lose her or worse she’s going to lose me.” Tears start to fall down her face. “I don’t want to leave her Alex.”

Alex moves Kara’s hand from her face to wrap her in a hug letting her sob into her shirt. “You’re not going anywhere Kara. I won’t let it happen.”

“But what if I do? What if something happens and I die or she dies? Alex I couldn’t live knowing she was gone or in pain.” Kara sobs harder into Alex

“This reminds me of the time you tried to break it off with her because she got a cut from that robot that tried to attack her. Do you remember what I told you then?”

Of course Kara remembers it. The feeling she had then are coming back but this time they are a lot stronger. There’s more on the line. “Yeah,” she sniffled pulling back so Alex could hear her. “You told me, I quote ‘am an idiot if I let it get in the way of being happy’.”

“That’s right you just have to take one day at a time Kara. I know you're scared and I bet Lena is just as scared if not more. I don’t think these feelings will ever go away. You just have to learn to not let them control you.” Alex squeezed Kara tight adding “and you both have some pretty great friends and family that will protect both of you no matter what. You just got to see it as half full instead of half empty.”

Kara squeezes back “you’re the best Al.” Loosening her grip some Kara looks up at her big sister “so when are you going to ask Maggie?”

Alex lets out a nervous laugh “What?”

“You two have been together longer than Lena and I have. So when are you going to do it.”

“Isn’t mom supposed to be here to help with your pt?” Alex gets up out of the bed walking to the door. “I’m going to go find her.”

“Alex! Come back and give me answers and ice cream!” Kara shouts knowing her words don’t reach Alex.

A few minutes later Eliza walks in. She and Kara work on arm and leg movements for half an hour before she takes some blood samples telling her she will be back in the afternoon to go over the stretches again. Eliza told her that if they see improvement over the next week they might let her try to do something not too risky to get her powers back seeing as they have not found a way to inject adrenaline in her to jump start her system.

After Eliza left Lena walks in with a bag of food.

“Hey you’re up! How are you feeling?” Lena asks cheerfully dropping the bag of food on the bed. She pulls out a blueberry muffin and hands it to Kara. She takes another one out for herself then sits in her chair.

“Good just finished my physical therapy with Eliza so,” Kara shrugs picking at her muffin.

Lena could tell something was off; the crinkle is resting on Kara’s face. “Kara, honey what’s wrong? You’re not telling me something aren’t you?”

Kara glances up at those bright shining green eyes and all she can see is tear stained cheeks and ruined mascara. Sleepless nights and dark mornings because of her. She feels guilty for things she cannot control and it’s killing her inside.

Lena places her hand over Kara’s injured one and waits for her to talk. Kara tries to tell her about her dream but it’s like she’s back there again unable to form words, unable to cry for help. So she just sits and waits for her voice to work. Hoping Lena will know without her speaking how much she is hurting.

Lena knows Kara is a brilliant reporter yet is still surprised when she is unable to form words. So Lena does what she normally does when Kara wants to talk but can't form words. She reads.

Taking out her phone Lena picks up where she left off last night.

Every time Lena read to her voice soothed her. It made her think everything would be okay in this moment. The warm timber coupled with the slight accent on the O’s and U’s. The soft intake of breathe as she finished a long sentence. It was a rhythm she could get lost in forever.

Kara continued to pick at her muffin losing her appetite. “It was about you,”

It was barely above a whisper yet it was enough to make Lena stop reading. She put her phone down giving Kara her full attention, muffin forgotten.

“The nightmare I had last night. It was about you.” Kara furrowed her eyebrows together not taking her eyes off the muffin in her hand. “I could hear you say my name, and I tried to find you but it was _so_ dark.” Lena puts both hands over Kara’s left. “There was a light, a red one that kept speaking to me. And I tried to get to it but it was always just out of my reach.” Kara closes her eyes willing her voice not to break. “I tried so hard Lena, but I just couldn’t. Then this morning you were gone and I-” a sob breaks through, “I can’t,” Kara looks up to see Lena’s loving eyes, as a tear runs down her own cheek. “I can’t lose you Lena.”

“Oh honey, I’m not going anywhere.” Lena moves everything of the bed so she can climb in next to Kara under the covers.

Resting her head on Lena’s shoulder Kara says “but it’s more than that Lee, I don’t know what you would do if you lost me. I can’t bear to think how much that would hurt you. I don’t want you to hurt because of me. I love you too much.”

“You don’t think I feel the same way? I love you too much too let someone take me from you or you from me. I knew what I was getting myself into when I asked you out on our first date Kar. It didn't matter to me. If I knew then what I know now I would still ask you out. Always and forever.”

“You would go through all this pain again just to be with me?” Kara asked hesitantly

“I would go through a thousand lifetimes of pain if it meant I could get to be happy with you even if only for a day. Wouldn’t you do the same?” Lena lifted Kara’s chin so they could look at each other.

“Yes,” Kara didn’t even have to think about it. “Yes I would,”

“Then there is nothing too scary we can’t get through together. Why do you think I married you?”

“My charming good looks,” Kara says sarcastically.  

“That and you give me strength. I know when you are next to me there is nothing I can’t do. You are my hero Kara Zor-El.” Lena leans in to capture Kara’s lips. Pulling back only to look in her eyes and kisses her again.

“You’re my hero too Lena"

 

*****

 

_One day on her usually mid afternoon fly around the city Kara hears a sneeze coming from inside Lena's office. Kara decides to go check up on her girlfriend seeing as Supergirl is not need at the moment._

_Landing on Lena's balcony she walks in and finds Lena hunched over her desk sniffing._

_“Lena are you sick?” Kara walks over and puts a hand on her back._

_Lena looks up, eyes and nose red, at her girlfriend of a month. “Luthor's don't get sick Kara,” she sneezes._

_“Umm hm,” Kara hums and puts her hand over Lena’s forehead not believing her for one second. Her new girlfriend maybe a billionaire CEO but she's human and even humans get sick. “You're warm,”_

_“Am not,” Lena pouts. Swatting Kara's hand away from her to finish some business reports that need to be finalized by tomorrow. She sneezes again, groaning._

_“Well what would you call this?” Kara asks with her hands on Lena's desk looking her in the eye._

_“An inconvenience,” she states, moving back to work._

_“Lena, you need to go home and rest.” Kara organizes some of the papers on her desk to convince Lena to leave._

_“I was fine this morning and I am fine now. It's nothing a little ibuprofen can't fix.” She coughs once. “This quarterly report isn't going to finish itself now it's Kara?” Lena slows for a brief moment glancing up at her girlfriend who is giving her best puppy eyes._

_“Can't you get Jess or someone else to do this so you can go home and rest?”_

_“No one else will do it right.” And that's the truth._

_Huffing Kara sits in the chair opposite Lena. “How about we make a deal.”_

_Stopping her writing Lena eyes Kara, this will be interesting. “I'm listening,”_

_”You work from home. I'm sure whatever it is you're doing can be better done in the confines of your own home, where you are in more comfortable clothes.” Kara clearly knows how to handle a business deal._

_Two can play at that game. “And just what exactly is in it for you?” The tired CEO leans back in her chair._

_“You only work after you nap and eat some soup.” Kara offers straightening up in her seat._

_“I don't know Kara, this report needs to be finalized by tomorrow. How do I know once I get home you'll change our agreement?” Lena fiddles with the hem of her skirt._

_“You don't,” at this Kara smiles._

_Lena knows logically that it would be more efficient to work at home when she's feeling a little under the weather. But if Kara is there there's no way she's going to finish this report, yet no one has ever been so adamant about her staying healthy before. This is new territory for her._

_Looking at Kara Lena know this is a losing battle she feels tired and wants nothing more than to cuddle up under a blanket and sleep._

_“Deal.”_

_Kara jumps in the air and throws a fits in the air. “Yay! So let's go. How comfortable would you be flying home?” She can hear Lena's heartbeat quickening._

_“Kara,” Lena breaths worriedly. “You know how I feel about that.”_

_“But can I fly you home? It would be quicker.”_

_“Don't drop me,” Lena grabs what she needs as Kara picks her up bridal style._

_“I would never,” Kara said faux offended stepping out in the balcony and flies them to Lena's apartment._

_Setting the frazzled and sick CEO down Kara takes a step back not quite knowing what she should do._

_Sensing her discomfort Lena puts a hand on Kara’s shoulder. “I’m going to go change, would you like to change into something more comfortable as well?”_

_“I'll just fly home and grab something and get you some soup. Any requests?” She asked enthusiastically._

_“Anything is fine Kara,”  Lena sneezes. A cute little one that Kara finds adorable._

_“Okay. I'll be back in a jiffy.” And with that Kara flew out the same way she came in leaving Lena alone in her cold minimalistic apartment._

_Walking to her room to change Lena felt quite tired. Whenever Kara showed up at her place it always felt warmer. Homeier. She missed her already._

_She walked out of her room in sweats and an old Harvard t-shirt to sees Kara fly in wearing pajamas with cats and dogs on them. She looks so cute, Lena thinks. “Adorable,” she coughs out._

_Kara looks down at herself and smiles. “These are my favorite.” Opening a bag in her hand Kara pulls out a container and puts it down on the coffee table in front of the couch. “I got you chicken noodle, I hope you like it.”_

_Lena smiles at her and sits on the couch motioning for Kara to follow. “Wait! Spoons!”_

_“Second drawer on the right,” Lena tells her as Kara rushes to get them and reruns sitting next to her sick girlfriend. Their shoulders touch._

_“Thank you Kar,” she lets the pet name slip. Kara looks at her with wide eyes and smiles. It isn't the first time Lena has used the pet name but it it's the first time she's said it since they started dating and it warmed Kara's heart to hear Lena say it._

_“Only the best for my girlfriend,” Kara will never get over how that word sounds. Handing the soup to Lena with a spoon Kara opens the other bag filled with Chinese food. “Wanna watch a movie?”_

_“You're trying to turn this into an impromptu movie night aren't you?” Lena asks with a smirk on her face._

_“Maybe,” Kara giggles. “After the movie you can continue to work if you so choose.”_

_Looking at the smile on Kara's face make her feel better than any soup ever could. Lena turns on the TV and let's Kara choose a movie to watch. As she eats some of the soup._

_“Can you get sick?”_

_“Nope. Well, not from any human diseases unless I solar flare which is rare so no?”_

_“So does that mean I can kiss?” Lena asked._

_Kara turns to face Lena smiling. “Well I guess as long as you don't sneeze on me.”_

_“I would never,” Lena parrots the words Kara said earlier. Leaning forward she kisses Kara briefly then lays her head on her shoulder. “Thank you,”_

_Kara rubs her cheek on Lena's head “any time Lee.” Kara flips through some more movies until she sees finding Nemo. “Oo, look Finding Nemo is on!”_

_“What is that about?”_

_“Lena have you never seen finding Nemo?” Kara looks shocked._

_“Wasn't really allowed to watch movies when I was younger.” Lena whispers in her ear._

_“Well that's about to change because we're going to watch this now and then finding dory.”_

_“There are two movies?” Lena takes another bite of her food._

_“Yep, I think the second is better but you can be the judge of that.” Kara plays the movie and starts to eat her own food._

_Halfway through the movie Lena passes out on Kara's lap. Her plan worked. Smiling Kara runs her hand through Lena's dark hair and falls asleep to the peaceful rhythm of sleeping girls heart_

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (when you rewrite all of the next chapter bc u don't like it lol) also would u peeps mind if the rating went up a few notches like to M? I have an idea on something that would be plot relevant i've never written smut before so it may not be any good but i'll try. If u can guess what it's for I'll give u a virtual high five.  
> title song by adele


	8. I feel it coming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> home again home again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went ahead and changed the rating there's no smut in this chapter sorry :( but it should be in the next one. also there only one chapter left two if im feeling it   
> song title by the weekend

The next few days are much of the same. Breakfast, PT, nap, lunch, Pt, nap, dinner, movie, sleep, wake up and do it all over again.

Kara had to stay longer than the one week Eliza and Alex told her she needed. (She was currently on day eight.) Kara wasn't able to stand on her own until day six. She had to start slow and only put a little bit of weight on her foot. It was frustrating her to no end because one, it hurt a lot, and two, Eliza wouldn’t allow her to try and get her powers back until her knee was healed.

Kara wish they would throw her out a window then maybe she would be freaked out enough for her powers to come back. In the handful of times Kara has lost her powers they usually waited for someone alien to start attacking National City. It worked most of the time. Kara didn't think an alien invasion would kick start her powers but falling might.

As soon as Kara voiced her opinion on the matter Lena shut her down. There was no way she was going to risk it. Kara did admit it was a bad idea especially after their conversation the second day she was fully awake.

Kara just wanted everything to be normal again, she wanted her powers back, and she wanted to hold Lena without her looking at her like she was going to break. Kara understands now what Lena must have felt like when they first started dating. She's not made of glass even if she is injured.

Lena had discusses with Kara that she would be going back to work soon even if it was a few days a week. There were meetings and plans she had delayed to stay by Kara's side.

It wasn't that Lena even told her in an accusatory way that she would have to back to work but somehow Kara still felt guilty about preventing Lena from doing her job. Kara knew she shouldn't feel guilty at all because it was Lena's choice to postpone the meetings, yet here she is lying in bed staring at the ceiling feeling guilty for something out of her control.

It made her angry as well because she didn't want to feel what she was feeling. She just wanted to go back to the way things were before she ever decided to save all those people. If only she waited for J’onn and Alex then maybe she wouldn't be laying in this bed feeling terrible. But if she did listen to then then more people might have died.

Kara had been going over what little she remembered as best she could to see if she made the right call. In the end she knew she did the right thing because she saved so many people. It wasn't her fault she got hurt she was just doing her job. If anything it's the stupid Bad Guys fault that she's here. If they hadn't shown up ready to terrorize all of National City then Kara and Lena might be home right now making out and lounging around the apartment having lazy mid afternoon sex and cuddles.  _ Mmmmm that sounds nice, _ Kara thought.

As much as the two have cuddled in the past ten days it was starting to not be enough. She wanted more. She and Lena have never gone this long without touching each other before. Kara missed the feeling of Lena’s skin against her own. The feel of her breath against her neck when she was above her. Hands tangled in her blond locks, scratching their way down her to her collar bones. She missed the feeling of Lena's naked skin against her own and the taste of her lips as they whispered sweet nothings into her ear. What Kara missed most of all was the look on Lena's face when she came. Slacked-jawed, eyes closed silently screaming to a god foreign to her. She was soft and free; Kara would never get tired of making Lena look like that.

She wanted to make Lena look like that right now but she couldn't because her fiancée’s face was scrunched up and full of stress. Sitting in her usual seat next to Kara she was hunched over staring at her laptop typing away hurriedly, working on something L-corp related.

Eliza just finished up Kara's physical therapy. It was looking good and she hopped that she would be able to leave soon because Kara was almost her breaking point of not being able to hold Lena like she wanted too. They have been engaged for eleven days and all Kara could do was kiss her fiancée. They couldn’t even make out because Lena was afraid of hurting her.  _ I'm not glass! _

Kara looked at her beautiful fiancée typing away and was in awe of this woman. Not only was she super smart she was also  _ really  _ attractive. Even now with her supergirl baseball t shirt on and the sleeves pushed up past her elbows, her big thick black rimmed glasses and a pair of black joggers. Her hair was in a messy bun and the strands that fell out softened her sharp jaw line. Sitting on one of her legs Kara thought she looked  completely fuckable hot.

“I miss you,” Kara breathed out.

Lena looked up from her laptop, eyes peeking out above her glasses, staring at Kara. As soon as their eyes lock Lena's face softened and a small smile finds its way to her lips. “I’m right here darling.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Kara didn’t want to outright say what she wanted. “I  _ miss  _ you,” she emphasized the miss part hoping Lena would get it.

“Kara I miss you too.” Lena said unsure of what Kara meant.

Kara couldn’t believe this woman wasn’t picking up what she was putting down. And people said she was the oblivious one. “No, I want to feel you,” Kara glanced from Lena's eyes down to her chest, biting her lip.  _ Man did that shirt hugged her in all the right place, _ Kara thought.

“Oh,” Lena's eyebrows shot up. “ _ Oh,” _

Kara’s eyes traveled slowly back up to meet hers watching the other woman's eyes widen. “I've been stuck in this bed for what feels like forever and we’ve only kissed a handful of times. None of which are how I’ve wanted to kiss you since you asked me to marry you. And you, you've just been here for what? Three weeks?! And I know we've been all over the place emotion wise but I feel like we could both use something that makes us feel  _ so good _  together and forget for a moment about everything that’s happened to us.” Kara takes a deep breath before she continues, “I miss you so much Lena. Uggh this is the longest I haven't been able to,” her voice drops an octave, “feel you around my fingers.”

Lena was taken aback by Kara’s words for a moment. She hadn't really thought about sex consider Kara almost died and what not. She had been too focused on Kara's health and recovery to even  _ think _ about sex. Not to mention she was trying to run her company too. When she did have time to think it was usually about sleep. Sex was last on her list of things right now but considering Kara had lots of free time it seemed reasonable that it was first on hers.

Lena briefly let herself think about them together before she whispered “Kara we can't. Not here,”

“But Lena we used to do it all the time at your office!” Kara countered.

“Yes, where we can lock the door and tell Jess not to let anyone in. But these walls are made of glass with people walking by. I'm not about to let your sister or god forbid someone else walk in on us having sex.” Lena pointed to the glass doors.

“But I miss you.” Kara pouted like a child who was used to getting their way. “You look so hot in those clothes, Lee. It does things to me.” Kara’s eyes grew heavy with want as Lena looked down at her outfit.

Punching her glasses up Lena says, “God Kara you must really miss me if you think this outfit makes me look hot.”

“You have no idea,” Kara huffed turning to face the ceiling again.

Lena closes her laptop setting it on the floor as she scoots her chair closer to Kara. Lena takes her hand in hers, “I miss you too Kara. Eliza said we can go home soon. We can do whatever we want in the privacy of our own home and I'll show you what hot really looks like. Until then no funny business.”

Kara bites her lip and gets a twinkle in her eye when she sees Lena arch her eyebrow. “Can we try that move  _ I  _ want,”

“Depends on how well you behave, missy. If you don’t then it’s my turn to decide.” Lena chuckles as Kara groans.

“I just want to go home, now!”

______________

Two days later Eliza told Kara she could go home as long as someone could keep an eye on her. Lena said that she would be working from home for the first few days and then Alex could stop by if she was at the office. Eliza agreed then politely demanded updates on her condition twice a day. Kara thought it was overkill but Lena promised she would text Eliza whenever she could.

Eliza requested one more blood sample before they left and explicitly told Kara she was in no way to attempt to get her powers back. No one was able to figure out how to synthesize kryptonian adrenaline properly, not even Kara. (She didn't know much about biology, she was more of a hard science kind of gal). This meant Kara had to heal like a human until she could try anything dangerous. Which sucked.

Kara planned to go back to work Monday much to Eliza’s dismay. James was able to make sure she had a job to come back to when she was ready and Kara wouldn’t be able to thank him enough for that. She would just save his life the next time they worked together and call it even.

Once their things were all packed and ready to go and Eliza got what she need, Kara and Lena finally went home.

When they got there Kara was so excited to see something other than the blank gray walls of the DEO that she almost fell over. Plopping herself down on the couch Kara looked around her apartment taking in the sunlight filtering through the blinds. Her art was littered along the walls bring to life the apartment. She was home.

“I am  _ so _ glad to be home again! I've missed you couch. I've missed you TV. I've missed you blanket. I’ve missed you pillows.” Kara looked at everything around her and told each and every thing how much she missed it, even the half dead plant that sat on the dining room table.

Lena watched the scene unfold from the kitchen, it was quite adorable watching Kara act so Kara like. Since they were finally home Lena decided to make them potstickers.

“Oo, what show should we watch first?” Kara shouts over her shoulder to Lena. They weren't able to catch up on shows they watch together at the DEO because the shows were meant for date nights cuddled together. Not awkwardly sat together on a small bed.

“Jane the Virgin,” Lena yells back as she pulls all the ingredients from the fridge, which her assistant Jess had restocked earlier in the day. She did not pay that woman enough. Lena didn’t know what she would do without her.

“Do you remember what episode we left off at? Was it eleven?”

“Yeah I think so,” Kara put the episode on as Lena continues to cook.

When Lena is done cooking she turns off the stove and fills their plates with food leaving a few extra just in case. Walking over to the couch Lena finds Kara’s head on the arm of it with eyes closed.

Lena places the plates on the ottoman and squats down to gently wake Kara up.

“Hey sleepy head foods ready.” Lena tells Kara who stretches into a sitting position. Taking a seat on the left side of Kara Lena picks up their plates to eat.

“I made the shrimp ones you liked last time.” Lena picked up a potsticker popping it into her mouth.

Kara almost inhales all the food on her plate with a constant hum of approval coming out of her mouth. Lena watched in awe as this woman ate potsticker after potsticker. Kara even had the same look on her face when she was concentrating on painting. It was cute. It felt normal.

Kara was on her tenth one when she said “Lena these are the best ones yet! I'm in love!”

“You say that every time I make them.”

Shoving another one into her mouth Kara mumbles “that's because they're  _ amazing!” _

“They do taste pretty good don't they,” Lena was on her fourth by the time Kara was done.

Kara looked at her empty plate then at Lena's, she had a few more left. Lena noticed Kara stating then handed her plate to her fiancée. “Thank you,”

“You’re lucky I love you so much or I would have eaten them in front of you.” Lena takes Kara's plate and goes back into the kitchen to grab the last three on the pan.

“You wouldn't,” Kara objected watching Lena.

“Oh, I would too.” Lena walked back taking her place beside Kara. “Your injured so I was being nice and all. I couldn't allow the woman of my dreams to go hungry now could I?” Lena smiles at Kara bopping her on the nose with her finger.

Kara giggled watching Lena eat the last of her potstickers. The sounds of the TV fading into the background as the two only have eyes for the other. “Rao, I'm so glad I'm home. I've missed this.” Kara took the empty plate from Lena's hands and put it on the ottoman. Leaning forward she moves her hand to cup Lena's face bring their lips together. “I've missed you,”

With Lena's lips on her, Kara felt like she was flying. Swiping her tongue over Lena's lip caused the woman next to her to moan. Kara pulls Lena closer, not having to worry about her strength, and bites Lena's lower lip. The kiss deepens as Lena moves one hand to the base of Kara's neck tangling the other one in Kara's hair.

They haven't kissed like this in what felt like forever. All heat and passion. Filled with need and hunger and promises that neither will break.  

For Kara it's not enough to just kiss Lena she wants her closer so she drags a hand down to Lena's side pulling her on top. As Lena settles in Kara's lap the blonde has to pull back to breathe. Lena can't take the waiting any more so she starts to move her hips against Kara. Kara yelps out of pain causing Lena jump off.

Lena watched as Kara moved her hands to her left hip rubbing in circles. “Kara are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

“No. You didn't hurt me Lee, I just got a cramp. The muscle is just a little sore. I'm fine” Kara quickly told her. Kara gently took Lena hands in her own pulling her closer so Lena's legs were on opposite sides of her own. “Can we pick up where we left off?”

Lena looked at Kara silently telling her they could continue if they were careful. “If you start to hurt let me know okay? I don't want you to be in pain.”

Kara nodded and pulled Lena back down into her lap. “You make all my pain disappear,”

“I do, do I?” Lena smiled into the kiss.

“Morphine’s got nothing on Lena Danvers,” Kara leaned in to capture Lena's lips but the brunette pulled back resting her hands around Kara's neck.

“Lena Danvers?” Lena raised an eyebrow in question. “I much prefer the sound of Kara Luthor myself,”

“What about Lena Danvers-Luthor?”

“Mmmm I like the sound of that Kara Danvers-Luthor.” She kissed Kara quickly then pulled back “I could get used to that,”

“Me too.” Kara said in between kisses.

“I'm glad you're home Kara,” Kara smiled at that.

They made out for what felt like hours rediscovering every inch of each other, but Lena put a stop to it before it could go any further.

Later they made their way into the bedroom to sleep with enough room for the both of them.


	9. Kiss it better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SMUT

Lena awoke the next morning with Kara cuddled into her side. She looked so peaceful and alive. Her hair was coming out of its ponytail as the sunlight filtered through the windows casting a halo around her.

Lena tucked a strand of hair behind Kara's ear as she stirred awake, “morning beautiful. Sleep well?”

Kara's eyes were still filled with sleep as she moved ever so slowly to kiss Lena.

“I'll take that as a yes. I'm hungry, I was thinking pancakes?”

“Perfect,” Kara mumbled pulling Lena closer to her.

“Kar, that mean I have to get up to make them,”

“But you're so comfy,”

“I'll be even comfier when my stomach stops growling,” Lena added trying to peel herself from Kara with no luck. Kara just rubbed her nose on Lena's neck making her shiver.

“Can you make the blueberry ones?”

Lena chuckled at how adorable sleepy Kara is, “yes I’ll make the blueberry ones. Can I get up now?”

“Kiss first please,”

“Of course how could I forget,” Kara moves back to allow Lena to give her a quick peck on the lips. Lena slides out of bed and throws on a pair of sweats on heading towards the kitchen.

Lena wasn’t much of a cook but she was good at following recipes. It was hard to burn things when they tell you what to do. In the kitchen Lena pulled out her tiny recipe book and started to make blueberry pancakes. She halved the usual amount of batter considering Kara wouldn't be able to eat that much without her fast metabolism.

Ten minutes later Kara got out of bed to the smell of pancakes. She hobbling her way to the kitchen island and sat down admiring Lena as she cooked. There was nothing covering those long ivory legs of hers. Wearing one of Kara's old college shirts her long raven hair flowed freely and Kara thought she was magnificent.

“I hate these crutches. They hurt my arm pit.” Kara tried to lay them down against the island but they fell.

“Sorry that they hurt you honey,” Lena told Kara as she poured the batter into the hot pan.

“It just so weird to not have my powers for this long. I miss hearing your heartbeat.” Kara huffed out. “But at least I have something nice to look at.” Lena turned her head around and gave Kara a coy smile.

“I hope my legs ease your suffering,” Lena teased.

“Oh they are working wonders,”

“Here are the pancakes you requested my love,” Lena sets a small stack in front of Kara and hands her a fork. Lena goes back and makes some more for herself.

“I don’t think your legs or these pancakes are going to soothe my pain for long, love. I'm afraid I don't know what will,” Kara said as dramatically as she could.

Once Lena made enough for herself she takes a seat across from Kara. “Hum, I guess you'll just have to suffer then.”

“I was think a bath and massage might help a little bit,” Kara told her as she shoved food into her mouth.

“A massage?”  

“Yeah a massage. Eliza said I have to keep up with my exercises and my muscles tend to be sore after, so a massage would help relieve the pain. It would be quite beneficial in the recovery process. Which I assume you want to be fast?”

“Well I wouldn’t want to hinder the recovery process now would I?”    

“It would be in National Cites best interest if they’re beloved superhero got everything she needed to recover as quickly as possible.”

Lena chewed a piece of her pancake before asking, “And what would be in it for the hero’s fiancée?”

Kara thought on this a moment before answering. “The hero’s undying gratitude. She would be forever in your debt.”

“Not good enough,” Lena argued.

“Not good enough?” Lena shook her head no at Kara’s question laughing to herself. “How about breakfast in bed? I’ll make eggs, toast, bacon, the whole nine yards.”

“Hum I don't know, a massage is a pretty big deal. I don't think breakfast in bed is going to cut it.”

“When said superhero gets her powers back she promises to get the chocolate from that tiny Italian place her fiancée loves so much,”

“And the breakfast is included as well?” Lena questioned.

“Of course. Only the best for the hero's best.”

“Then it's settled. You get a bath and massage and I get breakfast in bed and chocolate.” Lena smiles at Kara enjoying their banter.

When they were both done with breakfast Lena cleaned up and opened some emails for work, while Kara was in the living room doing her stretches. Lena was lucky because she only had a few emails that need to be sent today everything else could wait until later. Lena wanted at least one day of just the two of them like this, where neither had to worry about work or anything super related. These moments were few and far between.

Once Lena was done with her work, long after Kara and her stretches were, she gets up from her seat at the table and walks over to Kara.

“I’m going to take a bath if you want to join me.”  Lena whispered into Kara’s ear then kisses her cheek.

Kara was stunned as she watched Lena head to the bathroom swaying her hips. _She planned this_. It took Kara a second to process what was happening because Lena's hips were putting a spell on her. When she snapped out of it Kara clumsily got up and grabbed her crutches and moved as fast as she could to the bathroom.

The bathroom was connected to the bedroom and as Kara entered she could hear music softly playing as steam filtered through bathroom door. Pushing the door open Kara saw Lena's back bare expected for light blue lacy underwear. The sight made Kara’s heart stop. She had been waiting for this moment, this sight, forever. She felt Lena calling out to her and damn was Lena right about showing her something hotter than what she was wearing at the DEO.  

Kara saw Lena tuck her thumbs in the side of her panties and slowly pull them down shaking her ass as she went.

As quickly as Kara could, she rid herself of her clothes without falling, and almost missed the sight of Lena lowering herself into the sea of bubbles. Her pale skin blended in with the bubbly water, hair up in a messy bun, this woman was a godesses.

Kara was quick to follow Lena into the tube but was a lot less graceful. Lena chuckled at the sight.  

“Sorry,” Kara huffed out.

“No need to be,” Lena said watching her from the opposite end of the bathtub. It was just big enough to allow Kara to stretch out her legs along the bottom. Lena grabbed on of Kara’s feet and tickled the eager girl.

“Hey! Stop that!” Kara moved her foot away.

“Just having fun Kar,” Lena teased.

“Yeah that’s not the kind of fun I was thinking of,” Kara slowly layed her hands on Lena’s legs massaging her calf’s.

“Oh, and what kind of fun were you thinking of Miss Danvers?” Lena raised her eyebrow in question as Kara moved her hands higher reaching Lena’s thighs.

“I think you know Miss Luthor,” Kara ran her hand dangerously close to Lena’s center before pulling back and taking her hands off her completely. Glancing at gorgeous woman across from her Kara could see lust take over Lena’s usually bright green eyes. Lena wanted this as much as Kara did.

They sat for a moment just looking at each other hunger evident in both eyes. Lean was drawing circles on Kara’s lower calf then she rose up out of the water and sat on her knees. Kara stopped breathing for a moment at the sight before her. Here was the woman she loved more than life itself in all her perfection. Kara couldn’t tear her eyes away from Lena’s breasts as the water rain down the valley between them. Her nipples hardened at the change in temperature and all Kara could think about is having on in her mouth.

Before Kara could act Lena came closer and straddled her right thigh, settling her knee right where she wanted it.

Wrapping her hands around Lena, Kara pulled her closer whispering, “You’re so beautiful,” before kissing her hard.  

Lena leaned back to catch her breath and Kara took this opportunity to take one of Lena’s nipples into her mouth. Lena moaned into the action watching Kara leave marks in her wake. Holding on Kara’s head Lena pulled her back to kiss her but Kara had other ideas. She kissed from Lena’s mouth down her neck sucking on her pulse point, down to her collar bones, and back again to her breasts. Lena bucked against Kara causing her to moan. Lena could feel how wet Kara was getting and it wasn’t because of the water.

“Kara,” Lena breathed out, pulling Kara away from her breasts. “As much as I would love to get off in this bathtub, I’d much rather get you off in bed where it’s warm.”

Lena got up first and grabbed towels so they could dry off before helping Kara out of the tub. After they dried off Lena led Kara to the bed and gently pushed her down on it.

Kara shimmied her way up the bed as Lena looked from the foot of the bed.

“Safe word?”

“Pineapple as always,” Kara answered ready to get the show on the road.

“Just making sure. Are you ready?”

“Just get up her and fuck me good like I need it.”

Lena smiled at Kara’s use of profanity, she only ever cursed like this in the bedroom and Lena would be lying if she said it didn't turn her on. But hard and rough wasn’t the route Lena was heading she was going to make love to Kara. Kiss every single inch of her skin until she unraveled.

Slowly Lena crawled up the bed to straddle Kara again and kissed her softly. Holding Kara’s face in her hands she kissed her like she wasn't going to leave, she kissed her trying in some odd way to become a part of Kara. Sensing a change in pace Kara held Lena closer kissing her deeply.

Eventually Lena made her way down Kara’s neck marking her. She bit down hard where Kara’s neck meet her shoulder and soothed it with her tongue. She kissed over the scar on her shoulder and kissed down her arm. When she reached her hand she kissed each finger and did the same to her left arm taking special care of the long scar. Lena moved back to kiss Kara again and smiled with tears in her eyes as she lowered herself over the scar centimeters above where her heart lies.

Kara could feel hot tears fall against her cool skin. Putting a hand in Lena’s hair she pulled her back up into a searing kiss. “I’m not going anywhere,” Kara wiped away the tears.

With a shaky voice Lena spoke, “I love you so much Kar,”  
  
“We don’t have to do this right now if you don’t want to,” Kara tucked a loose strand behind Lena’s ear.

“No, I want to. I just didn’t realize,” she places a hand over the scar on Kara’s chest, “how close I was to losing you.” Lena wouldn’t be able to live without Kara by her side. Kara was her rock in the storm of life. The one constant she can always count on. Lena glanced down at the scar; it was about the size of her pinky. She kissed it again before she reconnected her lips to Kara’s. She felt strong hands trail paths from her hips to her shoulders. They moved down to her thighs then back to her hips. Lena could feel the love Kara was pouring into the kiss, she had to pull back before it became too much, and allowed Kara to suck on her pulls point.

Moving to Lena’s ear Kara whispered, “I love you. This is real can you feel what you do to me Lee?” Kara took Lena’s hand and placed it against her center. Lena moaned at the contact, feeling how wet Kara was for her caused Lena to move down and kiss and kneed Kara’s breasts.

She took one in her mouth flicking the nub with her tongue before biting down on it. Kara moaned and arched into the touch. Lena switched sides giving the same treatment to the breast and massaged the other one. Lena could feel Kara’s hand in her hair trying to push her further down to where she wanted her but Lena had other plans.

Lena ran her hands down the sides of Kara and kissed her away to her bellybutton. Her abs were a little less defined than normal but Lena loved them nonetheless. Finally Lena made her to Kara’s center. Her arousal smelled like sunshine and honey. Looking up from between her legs she could see Kara staring at her silently begging for her to touch her. Taking pity on the girl Lena slowly licked up her slit missing her clit. The contacted made Kara buck her hips and Lean laughed and did it again, still missing her clit. 

Kara was getting impatient. “Lena _please,_ ” she moaned.

Lena licked around her clit which made Kara say a string of kryptonian explosives. Lena did it again. Licking around the her clit then sucking it. She watched Kara take her hand away and move them both to grasp the sheets.

Slow and steady was Lena’s way. She could tell Kara was getting close but she wanted her to prolong it. She dipped her tongue inside her and felt Kara clench.

“Lena,” her eyes were tightly closed.

She took her mouth away from Kara and asked as innocently as she could “yes darling,”  

“ _Lena,”_ Kara practically growled. “Fuck, make me cum. I can’t take it anymooo-” Kara was cut off when Lena inserted two fingers into her.

Kara’s eyes rolled back and she let out a string of expletives. Lena loved the way Kara would clench around her fingers right as she was about to cum. Kara did this cute little thing with her face every time before she cums. She scrunches her face as tight as she can then grabs the sheets, as her back arches of the bed. Then she stills for a few seconds as her climax washes over her and falls back down. 

But this time was different. Right as Lena pushed Kara over the edge she heard a loud rip as Kara screamed out her name. Lena looked up between Kara’s legs to see where the sound came from. Kara held part of the mattress in her hand and all Lena could do was laugh.  
“What? Did I squirt?” Kara looked confused.

Lena pointed to Kara’s right hand, “damn I’m good,”

Kara looked from her hand to the mattress then at Lena. “Well that’s one hell of an adrenalin high.”

Lena moved back up the bed lying next to Kara. “Who knew me and my fingers could give and take Supergirl's powers.”

“I’m impressed Lena. I guess you deserve a reward for all you hard work.” Kara smiled a Lena

“Oh yes please!” Lena practically jumped off the bed. “We should probably turn on the red light to dampen you powers.”

Kara flipped them so she was now on top of Lena. “No way. I’m going to fuck you just how you like it.”

They spent the rest of the day in bed trying to see how much they could make the other one cum. Kara one by two before Lena passed out.

The next morning Kara made her lovely fiancée breakfast in bed before called Alex to tell her the good news leaving out exactly how powers came back. She wanted to spare her sister the embarrassment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last chapter it's been really fun to write this story and i hope you enjoyed as much as i have. i have an idea for a possible one shot involving these two set about a month before they start dating that's full of angst so watch out for that. if u wanna talk hc about supercorp hmu @ i-am-kantkiss-neverclean on tumblr  
> thanks for all the kudos and comments they mean the world to me! :)   
> title song by rihanna

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first time writing and publishing stuff so be nice pls. i have the whole thing planned out i just got to write it  
> the title is a lyric to adele's "i miss you"  
> and if you got any questions hit me up on tumblr i-am-kantkiss-neverclean


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